On August 10, 2015, my heart stopped for four minutes and thirteen seconds due to surgical complications and I was fortunate enough to be given a second chance at life.
This past weekend was Easter weekend and of course I heard all of the jokes about how I was basically Jesus for dying and coming back to life. Sacrilegious and blasphemous? Potentially. However, my resurrection is a topic of interest to a lot of people. People always want to ask what I saw, but what I saw isn't the important part of the story: it's what I learned. So let me share what I learned with you.
Here are fifteen things I learned that day.
1. Live every single day as though it were your last
Because it very well could be. My surgery was supposed to be a common surgery with little to no complications. In fact it was morphine, a common anesthetic, which stopped my heart. My death was a shock to all, most of all the nurses. So remember, tomorrow is never a guarantee. No one likes to talk about death, and why would they? It's a pretty heavy topic. But live today as if it was your last day. Do everything you would do on your last day. Say everything you ever wanted to say to anyone. You being alive today is a gift; so appreciate it.
2. Never hold grudges.
There is a famous quote attributed to the Buddha, he never actually said it but whatever, basic bitches need something to caption their Instagram pictures to seem ~deep~, that goes "Holding a grudge is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." Life is too short to hold on to grudges. It poisons your soul and your mind and once you forgive you will feel a weight lifted off your shoulders. If today was your last day, then tomorrow when you died your grudge would die with you and there would be no point. Life is too short to spend even a second of it holding onto a grudge.
3. Hate is a useless emotion.
Life is too short to spend even a second of it doing anything besides loving life. There is no reason for hate. Its a disgusting emotion that steals joy from your mind. Your life too short to have any joy robbed from it.
4. And there is no reason for regret.
In that moment, you wanted to do it, so why regret it now? Whatever you did, it made you into the person you are today. If you don't like the person you are, work towards becoming a better person. Not because of regret, but because of desire. Desire is far more powerful than regret and brings joy, not pain. Only look forward, for looking backwards is useless.
5. Never apologize for doing what makes you happy.
Joy and happiness are the greatest feelings the human body can feel, besides an orgasm, so why not spend every minute you can being happy? As long as what you do is not hurtful to others, then do it. Often. And never allow anyone to judge you.
6. Never apologize for having sex.
Slut shaming is archaic and disgusting, but that's a discussion for another time. This is an argument I make to everyone, but the human body is designed for reproduction. Everything our bodies do, is to have sex. Life is too short to not have sex often and well.
But also never apologize for not having sex. If that's what makes you happy, then your happiness is the most important thing.
7. No one is better than anyone.
As grim as this is, we all die. In the end, all of us will become food for worms. No one is better than anyone because of their status, friends, or life choices. The only thing you should judge people on is how they treat other people.
8. There is never any excuse to be rude.
You catch more flies with honey than vinegar. There is never any reason to be rude. Ever. I am not saying if there is a problem you should not confront it, but you can do so without being rude. There is no reason for rudeness, ever.
9. There is never a reason not to make a new friend.
Piggybacking off number seven, everyone is equal. Why not make memories and become friends with everyone you can? The connections we make with people are what make life worth living. My father once told me, its not your life that matters, it's the impact you leave on others. Be nice. Be kind. Be friendly. Make friends and have deep conversations. Enjoy others. Because in the end, what good comes from being judgmental and reclusive?
10. Tell the people you love how much you love them each and every day.
If you had the time to read this article, you have the time to tell the people you love how much you love them. If you died tomorrow, how would you feel if you died without telling your friends how much they mean to you?
11. Never go one day without spending an hour with one of your closest friends.
Spend time with people. Enjoy their company. Even if you don't speak and just sit and do your homework together. Those are the memories that mean the most after you lose someone.
12. Take pleasure in the small things.
Drink your favorite chai. Watch the sunset. Talk long walks. Smell the flowers. Find happiness in the fact that you are alive and can do these things.
13. Skip class to make memories.
Now don't skip every class. You still need to graduate. But skip one or two to make memories that will last a lifetime. Go to concerts. Go to museums. Become one with history. You are a part of the narrative of mankind. Make yourself a character in the story.
14. Wake up every morning thankful for being alive.
Because it is not a guarantee. Even on the worst of Mondays, wake up and go "I am so happy I am alive and can live today." It will put you in a great mood. Then, share your happiness with everyone.
15. "Life is too short, and time is always wasted, so let's have the time of our life while getting wasted."
Everyone who has ever drank with me as heard this cheers. I toast every shot I ever take with a cheers. Alcohol is bringing me closer to my grave, so I make sure to make every shot count for something. There is so much in life to raise a glass and cheers to, so toast every shot to something in your life. Have fun. Be wild. Do crazy things. Live your life. Be young, dumb, wild, and free, without regrets or hesitations.
Live today as if it was your last day on Earth, because you never know, it could be.
