As a long-distance runner who thrives on the light at the end of the tunnel (a glass of chocolate milk) and the possibility of someday making it to the Disney Marathon, I've had to ability to pick out why being a runner makes life more fun.
1. Admit it, you’re a chocolate milk snob. You know the difference between generic brand and the real deal, but in the depths of your soul, Promised Land Chocolate milk tastes like drops of heaven after a long run.
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2. Your shortest pre-race warm ups consist of nothing less than a mile or two run and you’re used to people giving you looks for doing a pre-run run.
It’s a thing. It’s totally a thing.
3. You use the phrase “eight-mile run” and “easy long run” in one sentence.
*prepare for a sore butt for the next day*
4. Whenever you’re going somewhere, you calculate your distance in meters and mileage and not necessarily time.
400 meters to go until the Whole Foods? At 7:00 minutes per mile pace? You got this.
5. What does “New year, new me” even mean? In your book it’s “New shoes, new me”, right? Right????
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6. Getting to sleep in is a luxury, but that doesn’t mean that you feel like a little piece of you was missing because you didn’t put in an hour or so running today.
7. You prefer cross country season to track and field season.
8. Most of your expenses are spent on running gear meaning that when you do your laundry it’s 75% sports bras and spandex...
You might even have to wear normal clothes for a while???? Say it ain’t so.
9. Your perfect date....is either sometime in fall or spring considering that’s when the best running weather is.
10. You can eat twice your weight in carbs aka any pasta and bread that is known to mankind.
11. Your feet aren’t the most physically attractive part of your body
But hey, one black toenail and 4 blisters won’t stop you, no siree.
12. You’re used to running through cans of shaving cream and razors.
If you’re going to be running 8 miles, you’re gonna make sure your body looks somewhat well kept in shorts and a tank.
13. Your weekend plans consists of mapping a new running route or bathing in an ice cold water with Epsom salt.
Your friends know better than to ask you out to a raging night downtown post run.
