Some days I wake up too numb to want to do anything. It's not sadness, it's not laziness, it's just this overwhelming feeling of nothingness. On days like this I wish I could disappear because maybe then that feeling of nothingness would go away. Other days I'll be on the brink of tears all day for no reason. And when I get home the tears will fall for hours. This is what my depression looks like. I don't tell many people because usually they say the wrong thing, something that does nothing to help and everything to hurt. Opening up to someone about mental illness is an incredibly personal thing so if someone opens up to you please don't say these things to them.
1. "But you're always so happy."
Are you trying to convince me that I don't have depression?
2. "You just need to get out there."
I have a hard time just getting out of bed. Getting "out there" probably won't happen for a while.
3. "You need to think positively."
That's not really how it works.
4. "Maybe you're just having a bad day."
Well it's been a few years of "bad days" so I'm pretty sure it's more than that but okay.
5. "Happiness is a choice."
I suppose, but that's difficult when your brain isn't cooperating with you.
6. "You should exercise more."
Yes, physical health and mental health are connected but that doesn't mean exercise will solve everything.
7. "Can't you just get over it?"
No. If I could don't you think I would have?
8. "So many people have it worse than you do."
Thank you for invalidating my very valid feelings.
9. "Your problems aren't even that bad."
Is there a ranking scale that I didn't know about?
10. "Is this just your way of getting attention?"
You caught me. I'm miserable all the time and isolating myself for attention.
11. "Try not to think about it."
You know, I do try not to think about it and sometimes that works for, like, five seconds. It's always there in the back of my mind.
12. "Cheer up!"
I want to be happy I really do! It's just not that easy.
13. "It's all in your head."
People don't choose to have depression and it is most definitely not just in their head.
If you know someone struggling with any mental illness, one of the best things you can do for them is simply be there, no words required.