Those of us who regularly drink Diet Coke are a special kind of breed. We are simple creatures with simple needs, and those needs can typically be satisfied with a quick run to Sonic for an ice cold Diet Coke. We try to justify our addictions. We say things like "it helps me get more done" and "I'm just a lot nicer after I've had my caffeine." And it definitely does all of those things, but without the excuses, the truth is that we really just like Diet Coke. It tastes really good and you can follow it on Twitter. Taylor Swift likes it. It's fun to look for your name on the bottle. It's honestly just better. There are not a lot of reasons why we don't need it in our lives. I mean, there's like health reasons, but it's cool. We're cool. Here are thirteen things all Diet Coke lovers know to be true:
1. Diet Pepsi is NOT the same thing and we need to put that in writing.
Please don't offer me a diet 'anything else' if I ask for the Coke kind. It's bad manners. I'll just have a water.
2. We like it best from a soda fountain in a Styrofoam cup.
Cans should be poured into a cup if at all possible. The fizz can get overwhelming at times and I am overwhelmed enough as it is.
3. It is the only thing that can cure a headache, a bad day, or an afternoon slump.
No I'm not going to exercise or eat a piece of fruit. I need REAL energy.
4. You get tired of people asking you if you're on a diet.
I understand that ordering a Diet Coke with my burger and fries seems ironic. I'm not doing it to counteract anything; it just tastes better than the regular stuff.
5. And then they try to tell you that Diet Coke is "worse for you than just regular Coke."
I know this is coming from a good place, but your propaganda won't stop us.
6. And trust me, we have tried to quit.
7. But we all have our vices.
8. And the withdrawals are SO real.
OH THE HEADACHES.
