New relationships are fun and exciting. You get butterflies every time you see them but you also kind of want to throw up because you are so nervous. (Slightly exaggerated for dramatic effect.)
Of course, there are times when fear is totally normal and justifiable in new relationships like meeting their parents, having sex for the first time or even the first date. But there are other times when we just freak our selves out for no reason.
(Also, can we take a second to acknowledge that I am channeling my inner Carrie Bradshaw for this article?)
We are all guilty of these:
1. First kiss.
You are smashing your face hole to another face hole. We romanticize the shit out of kissing but they were probably chomping on a slab of beef not that long ago. Sure, get the jitters but this is something dumb to lose sleep over in anticipation.
2. First fart.
This one cracks me up. Why in the hell are we so scared of NORMAL BODILY FUNCTIONS?
3. First pig-out.
Something about stuffing your face full of junk food is nerve-wracking. But if they judge you, why the hell would you want to be with them?
4. First ugly-cry.
Yeah, this is vulnerable but it mostly scares me because of the ugly part. However, how a person reacts to this tells you a lot about their character. So once again, if they judge you or make you feel dumb, is that someone you really want to be with?
5. First time they ugly cry.
It can be scary that you won't be able to properly comfort them but get over it. This clearly isn't about you.
6. First poop.
Again, NORMAL BODILY FUNCTION.
7. First really drunk.
A different side of you comes out that sometimes is not really in your control. There is the chance you say or do something incredibly stupid.
8. First queef.
This one is my nightmare (because I do have a vagina). I have to keep reminding myself NORMAL BODILY FUNCTION.
9. First major f-up.
I guess after your first big f-up comes, your first big apology as well as a glimpse into how they handle themselves in serious situations. So don't dwell on this one.
10. First time being sick.
If you are a pretty sweetheart when you are sick, you are also a dirty liar. I guess at some point they gotta see you with that sexy sweaty glow and goop coming out of your orifices.
11. First sleepover.
In an ideal world, you don't kick in your sleep and snore. Buuut damn it, there are a lot of worse things.
12. First time hanging with friends as a couple.
It can be awkward having your debut as a couple but the reality is your friends love you and will play nice at least the first time hanging with them.
13. First sext.
This one gives ya the jitters but if you have already slept with this person then you should be able to without freaking yourself out too much.
