I think we can all say that we have a love-hate relationship with our siblings. We can go from a full blown brawl one minute to laughing and casually talking the next. Being the oldest sibling comes with its pros and cons as does everything, but as the oldest you have some pretty big shoes to fill. You’ve paved the way and definitely taken the fall many a time for your younger siblings, but it’s all in the name of love right?

1. Bribing your sibling to keep secrets from your parents.

We have all had to beg our siblings to keep a secret from our parents at least once before, whether it was lying about where you were going, inviting a boy over when nobody was home or getting in trouble at school. These times can be extremely tense and you know that at any given moment your sibling can reveal some major secrets about you. You have to tip toe around for the next several weeks and you would never dare start a fight with them for fear of what they would blurt out in front of your mom.

2. Being blamed every time even the smallest fight breaks out.

“I barely even touched you!” is the anthem of every sibling duo. There are times when you can’t even look at each other without bickering about something, but regardless of what it was, it was always your fault. You never got the chance to explain yourself to your mom and would erupt in anger when your sibling would tattle on you yet again. Being the oldest child means accepting the blame in every argument because all your younger siblings had to do was cry for your mom to take their side.

3. Being held to a higher standard because you’re the oldest.

I cannot count how many times I was reprimanded for doing something wrong while I watched my sister grow up to do the same exact thing without consequence. Your parents think that you have to be perfect because you were the first born. They don’t want to feel like a failure and they have high expectations for you because they want you to be everything they were not. When they get to the younger siblings they have realized how unrealistic this is though.

4. Being the guinea pig for all of the rules your parents test out.

When you are the first born you are subject to all of the rules your parents are trying to test out and experiment on you with. For you, there were quite a few rules growing up like curfews or what age you could get the new iPhone. But with your younger siblings many of those rules went out the door shortly after your parents realized that they could not keep up with you and your sibling. So to the younger siblings, you’re welcome for helping make things easier for you.

5. Always having to set a good example for your younger siblings.

It always drove you crazy when your sibling would follow along as you did something wrong and then blame it on you saying that it was all your idea. Regardless of how old you guys get you always have to “set the good example” for your younger sibling. Despite the fact that your younger sister might be 16 by now, you are still the oldest and are expected to take the higher road, according to your mom. It always drove you crazy when your sibling would follow along as you did something wrong and then blame it on you saying that it was all your idea.

6. Getting the brunt of the punishments because your parents gave up after you.

You were the one that got grounded for two weeks every time you would try to sneak out to a party. You were quite used to losing privileges right and left when you were little, while you watched your younger sibling get off easy on so many things. You would get mad when their punishment would only be half as bad as yours was when you were their age. By the time your mom got to your younger sibling she knew what worked and what did not so they often seemed to get out of a lot when it came to getting in trouble.

7. Watching your siblings get privileges at a much younger age than you.

As the oldest child you remember having to wait until middle school until you got your first cell phone or computer. But with your younger siblings, electronics, clothes and toys became so much more advanced that it always seemed like you were getting slighted. It always felt like your younger siblings got the newest and fanciest toys or electronics before you did. You always threw a fit when they would get a brand new phone at the same time as you even though you were several years older.

8. Being the boss every time you and your siblings played games.

Every single time my sister and I would play any sort of game I was inevitably the boss. I was always the mom when we played house, and I always made the rules when we would play outside. This is definitely a perk of being the oldest child because you know that your siblings will listen to whatever you say. You were used to calling the shots and being the leader every time you guys would play together and you loved getting to call the shots.

9. Having to share your stuff.

Growing up, you always hated having to share your stuff with your sibling. Whether it was your toys, the T.V. or even that last piece of cake, you never wanted to give it up. Sometimes your mom would even have to designate certain amounts of time that you and your siblings were allowed to watch T.V. to make sure that everyone got a turn. Even as you got older it was still a common occurrence to argue with your sibling about sharing something and you usually had to sacrifice it since you were the oldest.

10. Mysteriously losing some of your belongings for months on end.

This one is especially true for sisters. Every so often some of your clothes would go missing and six months later they would coincidentally show up in your sibling’s room. And every single time, your sibling would claim that they didn’t even know it was there. Sometimes they would even try to claim that you gave it to them. Your mom would often come home to you guys fighting over what belonged to who, and it would almost always end up belonging to you.

11. Learning lessons the hard way as your siblings watched.

Countless times your younger sibling would watch and learn as you failed a test, broke up with a boy and got rejected from colleges. They saw you learn many lessons the hard way growing up and learned many of those lessons along with you. You wished you had had an older sibling to teach you some of these lessons. Sometimes you loved getting to do things first as the oldest sibling, but it wasn’t always easy and you found yourself wishing you were the youngest sibling instead.

12. Wanting the best for your younger siblings no matter what.

Even though your delivery was a little off sometimes, or all the time, you just want the best for your younger sibling. Arguing aside, you hope that your younger sibling doesn’t make the same mistakes as you. So to all the younger siblings out there, thank you for putting up with us and you’re welcome for paving the way.