Although now I am thankful that I have such a unique name for a girl, I definitely did not feel this way as a child when I was surrounded by all the mean boys who ate girls' feelings for breakfast. Not a week goes by, even today, that I don't have some sort of comment or issue that comes up because of my boy name. Thankfully, I am the type of person to just laugh it off and move on, and now I love my name. Nevertheless, here are 12 things that every girl who has a boy's name knows to be true, and will probably still be true as long as we all shall live:
1. Getting to sit next to a girl in elementary school when they assigned seats "boy, girl, boy, girl".
I can't say this wasn't the worst thing ever. I got to sit next to a girl instead of a gross boy who smelled like dirt and cooties. The teacher always had to double check her list though because she was thoroughly confused how she possibly made a mistake.
2. When a substitute teacher thinks you are trying to play a joke.
The great substitute teacher who comes in and is absolutely not going to be messed with by these middle schools brats. He takes roll call, and when he says my name I raise my hand, then proceeds to tell me "You're not Logan." Wait, what? I mean I know I am very forgetful, but last time I checked my birth certificate I am pretty sure it said Logan. "Are you trying to play a joke and switch names with a boy in here? Where is Logan?"
You're right sir. I am not Logan. I must be confused.
3. Getting mail addressed to "Mr. Logan Lynch"
The greatest part about this is it usually comes from somewhere very important, like financial aid or banks or taxes or something else important that I can't think of because usually I don't get important mail.
Like, shouldn't you people know that I am a girl? Isn't that like the first question you get asked on any form that existed ever?
4. Never having any name keychains that were girl themed.
You know what I'm talking about: those keychains, magnets, pens, etc. that stores would sell that said your name on them. Because who didn't like having items that had our name plastered all over them?
There were always girl themed ones, and boy themed ones. Guess what side Logan was ALWAYS on?!?!
Yeah, it was a very reoccurring disappointment as a child.
5. Picking up prescriptions from the pharmacy and getting asked "What is HIS birthday?"
"I am here to pick up a prescription."
"For who?"
"Logan Lynch"
"Can I have his birthday please? Has he ever filled a prescription with us before?"
Well, MY birthday is October 4th and yes I have filled a prescription here before. Multiple times. So why is there not a place in your computer to indicate that I am a female. Thank you have a nice day.
6. Writing emails/texts to new people and having to indicate my gender.
Whether it be to a professor I haven't met, a potential employer, or any other random person I have to email for any specific reason, there is no way to communicate my gender without literally writing:
"Hello! My name is Logan Lynch (female)...."
I bet my parents didn't think about that issue when they named me back when email wasn't a word yet.
7. The surprised face when meeting someone, followed by "Oh I thought you were a boy!"
Based on how many times I get this reaction, I seriously question whether I am a boy as well.
8. The life goal to never become interested in someone with your same name.
Dating a boy named Logan? Absolutely not. What if we get married? Mr. and Mrs. Logan Lynch? Am I the girl or the boy? What if we have kids? Do we have to name them all Logan?
If you are a boy named Logan, please keep your distance.
9. "That's a boys name"
WHAT?!?!! IT IS?!?!?!?! 21 YEARS OF LIFE AND I HAVE NEVER KNOWN THAT THANK YOU!!!!
10. The unnecessary excitement you feel when you find a fellow girl in the world with the same name as you.
I AM NOT ALONE IN THIS WORLD! There are others out there like me!
I would instantly love every girl named Logan. Even if I didn't meet her in person but maybe accidentally found her while creeping social media. I knew we would be friends in real life because every girl named Logan was an automatic badass and we could bond over our life struggles.
11. The warm and fuzzy feeling you get when strangers fully appreciate the uniqueness of your name.
This happens most often when I am serving as a waitress:
"Hi, my name is Logan and I will be your server."
"What's your name again?"
"Logan. Yes it is usually a boys name."
"No I really like it, so unique and really cool!"
Me: