In this day and age, all you have to do is check your bank is open your smart phone and touch a button.....but no one wants to. Turning your bank account into an app makes it seem like its not as important to reality anymore...but it is. And you can't just do it randomly. There is a complicated process that turns into a beautifully vicious cycle.
1. Shopping spree
Not just any shopping spree, more like a shopping spree without acknowledging the reality of any prices, or life in general.
2. Realizing you need to check your account
It's fine. There's no way I spent that much.
3. Slowly opening app
Literally doing anything and everything else first before opening your bank app. Check facebook, check twitter, take a few selfies, idk.
4. Making someone else look for you
Maybe it won't be as bad if someone else looks at it instead of you.
5. But then being embarrassed about what numbers might pop up and take the phone back
Nevermind. You don't want them to see your failures.
6. Finally looking
The slow peeking through the fingers covering your eyes helps. Just like in horror movies.
7. Denial
HA! Clearly my identity has been stolen because there's no way I spent that....right?
8. Crying
Oh no. Here it comes. Why does this always happen? Why do I spend all of my money?
9. Self-Hatred
Actually, just go ahead and drink from the bottle
10. Job search for easy money
AKA Stripping
11. Promising not to spend any money for the rest of the month
Seriously. Not even going out to eat. It's not just a promise; it's a pinky promise.
12. Shopping again next week
YOLO.
