Life is hard, but life is made even harder when you have someone in your life that is making you feel like you're not enough or that you're failing at what you're doing. These relationships are toxic, and can only hold you back from being all that you can be. Know the symptoms of a toxic/abusive relationship, and know that you are not unjustified in feeling like you're being taken advantage of.
1. You feel trapped.
You have less confidence when you’re around them, and watch what you say/do so as to not give them any excuse to make you make you look the way that they make you feel.
2. They ask you to give up things that you love for them, to “prove that you love them more.”(Not including harmful things such as addictions or other destructive behaviors)
You have other friends, clubs, and activities that you’re a part of and want to share your time with. They begin to feel jealous, and sometimes make you feel guilty.
3. They constantly text you to ask what you’re doing.
Since they can’t be with you all the time, they try to control your attention through other means. They may just be bored, but if they won't stop even when you ask, this is a problem.
4. You don’t always feel safe.
You are on guard and don’t feel that you can predict their behavior.
5. You find yourself spending time with them out of obligation rather than desire.
You aren’t excited to see them anymore.You don’t really miss them when they’re gone, and you fantasize about being other places when you are with them.
6. They make you choose between them and your family or other loved ones, rather than trying to get to know all aspects of your life.
They refuse to be in other parts of your life and make you feel constant conflict because of it.
7. They make you feel worthless, or like you’re a “bad friend/significant other.”
You feel guilty like you can’t do anything right.
8. You don’t feel like your opinions or emotions are valued.
A true friend makes you feel important and makes you feel like what you have to say matters.They listen to you, and make sure you know how special you are to them through their attentiveness and their care.
9. You are afraid to mention something that is bothering you because they might react badly.
You don’t know how they will behave when you bring up conflict, so you just leave it alone, put up with it, and hope it gets better.
10. They make you feel stupid for having the beliefs, values, or hobbies that you do.
These things are important to you, but they are too busy insulting you that they either can’t see it or don’t care.You find yourself trying to justify everything you do as if you should need to.
11. They make you feel badly for being good at something because they are not.
They try to make you feel guilty for having skills, and somehow try to feel better about themselves by bringing you down.
12. You watch what you say; you avoid asking certain questions, touching certain topics, etc. You can’t be yourself around them.
You can be yourself around other people.You feel good around other people, even confident.So why can’t you be around this person?
All of these are some degree of emotional abuse.If it has been like this for a long period of time, it’s time to think about what’s best for you. You’re not doing any favors for the person who’s abusing you by staying in the relationship, nor to yourself.Just because you love them doesn’t mean you have to put up with less than respect.You deserve respect.
