When I was younger, I never imagined that I would have developed the road rage that I have today. The only problem with that is where I'm from, everyone has road rage. So, here are some of the reasons why I hate driving in my hometown of Baltimore, Maryland. From the perspective of someone with terrible road rage.

1. No one is courteous.

No one cares if you have somewhere to be or your wife is currently giving birth in your back seat. We all have places to be, and no one cares about your problems. So, naturally, if you need to switch into my lane, I'm not going to waste the time out of my day for you to get over.

2. No one says, "Thank you."

Now, supposing that I do take the time out of my day to let you over into my lane...and I mean, really take the time out of my day (like the extra energy to press my foot down on the break and the gas I wasted to slow down for you to get over into my lane) and you have the audacity not to throw your hand up to say thank you, we're going to have a problem. It takes about .04 seconds to wave your hand up to say thank you to someone, and no one does it. Nothing drives me more insane. God forbid you were the one that didn't raise your hand to say thank you and now I just so happen to be tailgating your ungrateful little Volvo. Well, I don't want to hear you complain. You should have just said thank you.

3. No one uses their blinkers.

On top of no one saying thank you,how am I supposed to know you need to merge without your blinker on? There is a reason that they test your blinker when you want your driver's license. God put your blinker there for a reason; use it. It is an inconvenience when I have to guess which way you are turning, and guess what? I'll probably guess wrong. So, let's save our insurance companies some extra work, and please just use your stinking blinker.

4. Merging from I-95 South to 395 is hell.

Now that we have covered the fact that no one lets you merge and no one uses their blinkers, Martin Luther King Blvd. is the perfect example of where this comes into effect. When coming off I-95 South, one must cut across three lanes of traffic to attempt to go to the Inner Harbor and downtown Baltimore (if you really want to go downtown, that is). Cutting across those three lanes is just asking for Jesus to take the wheel. Again, no one is going to let you over. So, you just need to accelerate to 8,000 RPM to get in front of everyone and then casually forget to use your blinker as you switch lanes, because that is what everyone around here does.

5. There's never a day without construction.

They've been doing work on I-95 since the pilgrims came over on the Mayflower. There's also this one awkward part of 95 where it splits into two lanes on each side of the construction, and people don't realize that it doesn't matter what side you go on since there aren't any exits along the way. But, of course, you have that one idiot who just sits in the lane to figure out what side they're going to drive on. Like I've mentioned, no one will stop for you, or let you get over, because we all suck. So, there's your excuse for not showing up to grandma's 80th birthday dinner on time: construction.

6. Charity shaming is a serious problem.

It's like you can't be at a red light anymore without someone asking for money. Somehow even when it's -0 degrees outside, the ASPCA is doing their annual donation and when you don't donate, Sarah McLaughlin starts singing, "In the arms of the angels," in the back of your head. Then there's the "Fill the Boot," which is the annual donation to surrounding fire houses. Then they walk past your car and you can't make eye contact because you just got home from college and have $0.53 to your name, but you're terrified that if they know your face they won't pull you out of that burning building you're stuck in (if you're ever caught in that situation). So then you find one penny, of course it's on tails, and you make your contribution.

7. You never know who's a cop.

Driving around downtown Baltimore, you can make a game out of which kid in the backseat will see more twenty-twos on a Crown Victoria. It's like you never really know if someone is an undercover cop, or they just wanted to pimp their ride. When it comes to figuring out who is really a cop, may the odds be ever in your favor.

8. Potholes are the size of craters.

It literally feels like all four tires are going to simultaneously pop when you hit a pothole in the city. I kid you not, the lines at Royal Farms for all that free air for your tires are longer than Ray Lewis' football career. Word of advice: On the off chance that you blow a tire in downtown Baltimore, you might want to just keep driving on the rim until you reach the side of 95.

9. The Golden Eggs.

Everyone knows this landmark that sits on the outskirts of the beautiful city of Baltimore. No one really knows where it actually sits though. Essex and Dundalk fight over where the Poop Plant is actually located. The one thing that can't be argued however, is the stench it creates. Here I am, just driving along 695 towards Sparrow's Point and boom, feces. It floods your entire car. You automatically look for something to plug your nose, but it's too late. You already feel like you're going to hurl. So, you speed up and try to outrun the smell, but you just have to embrace it. Before you know it, you're out of the kill zone and you await the next time your senses go to battle against the heavyweight champion of Baltimore County, the Golden Eggs.

10. Traffic.

Traffic is never too terrible in Baltimore. Only after a Ravens game or rush hour, obviously. However, when there is traffic, everyone is livid. We can't take two minutes to wait in traffic because we just don't have time for that. Then we all start tailgating more and have some serious close calls with the cars randomly deciding that the middle lane is going faster than the fast lane so they need to switch. Just for the middle lane to stop moving all together, might I add. By the time you know it, you've gotten nowhere and you've pissed off so many people because you neglected to wave when people let you over that it seems you have now become the new Ben Roethlisberger, aka the most hated person in Baltimore.

11. The tunnel is the same as any other road.

For God's sake, it is written every .013 miles on the walls of the tunnel; "Stay in your lane." It's written in big, black, block letters, so I know everyone obviously sees it. The same saying is also hanging from the top of the tunnel on lit up signs.There are two solid white lines. You can't switch lanes. No matter how much you want to, you can't. So, just because the speed limit is clearly 50 mph and the car in front of you is going 25 because they don't want to pull a Princess Diana, you still can't switch lanes. So don't.

12. Baby-on-Board stickers.

OK, I respect that you have a baby on board. I just want to put that out there. However, if you're going to put that sticker on your car because you want everyone else to drive more carefully, then don't drive like an imbecile yourself. Then when you forget to check your blindsides as you're merging because parent of the year over there is texting and driving, I'm not going to say to myself, "Oh, they have a baby on board sticker in their back window, so let me just sacrifice myself and hit the guard rail as I dodge the accident they are about to cause." No disrespect if you are a good, responsible parent with that sticker on your car, but to all of the irresponsible drivers that do, be more careful yourself before I drive with extreme caution for the protection of your child.

At the end of the day, living in a big city can really suck when it comes to driving. So, I'm sorry that I used some choice words when you cut me off and all, but I was raised this way.