Anxiety: a nervous disorder characterized by a state of excessive uneasiness and apprehension, typically with compulsive behavior or panic attacks.
In other words, mine and many others worst nightmare, our biggest fear, and the greatest nuisance to date. Anxiety is something that receives so much attention yet despite that attention and awareness, there is such little understanding. Anxiety is something that affects not only the person diagnosed with it but the people around them as well. It takes a huge toll on one's ability to perform, their personality, as well as their relationships not only with a significant other but with friends and family as well.
Here are 12 problems that I feel are most important for those unaffected to understand about anxiety. These problems all lie within a wide spectrum of things but are equally important.
1. The smallest and dumbest things make our heart race.
Sometimes something that may seem of such little significance to you is a huge deal for me. Little things get to me and cause the anxiety to come out full force, even things as little as not being able to find my phone, somebody waiting for me to be ready to go, meeting new people, or not being on time makes my heart race.
2. If we don't hear from you for awhile, we automatically think the absolute worse.
Don't get the expected text from our significant other, we assume we are unloved. Our family members don't get home at their normal time, we assume something bad has happened. The thought of the absolute worse seems unavoidable and eats away at us as your heart races as we squirm for an escape.
3. We love differently.
Loving somebody when you have anxiety vs loving someone is like comparing apples to oranges. We put up a wall in fear of letting others in. We constantly evaluate your every step and try to think how a situation is going to play out. We will convince ourselves of things that are not true and drive ourselves insane as we blame nobody but ourselves. We crave your love and affection and more times than not we need your reassurance. We will doubt if we are loved. Although, with all this being said, once you are in, you are in for the long run and we will love you like no one else has ever loved you before.
4. An anxiety pill can't always take all of our problems away.
Yes, anxiety pills help us... if they didn't we wouldn't take them. Although, it is important to know that the swallowing of a pill does not take away anxiety and it's entirety. There will still be days when the panic attacks take over and when our little "anxiety quirks" will still be observable.
5. Sometimes our anxiety shows in negative ways through our behavior or actions.
We may come off more often than not as trying to cause problems or bringing up a recurring issue. We DON'T do this for the hell of it, I promise. We do this because our anxiety makes believing certain things very difficult. We sometimes may come off as waking up on the wrong side of the bed, irritable, moody, angry. We are aware of how we are acting but keep an open mind and realize that we are acting the way we are because of a certain situation that we are in or because of a certain situation lingering over our heads.
6. Anxiety and panic attacks don't just last a few seconds.
No, I'm not going to magically feel better in the blink of an eye. In fact, I won't feel better in a thousand blinks of an eye. Anxiety and panic attacks can be short lived, although more often they are long lasting. Kind of like that fly that won't leave you alone as you eat your lunch in the outdoors, it's constantly there and a nuisance, to say the least. Please be patient when I'm having trouble getting over my anxiety or panic attack it is 10x more frustrating to me than it is to you.
7. We like to feel in control.
Sometimes, for some, situations where we can't be in control give us anxiety. This can be because of a large variety of things ranging from we like to know what is coming and we like certainty to a worry that we may have. Just know the reason we are anxious at times is because something is out of our hands.
8. Sometimes we need to be alone when others times we are craving your attention.
Depending on the mood you're in or your feelings we can want you close to us or we can want you on the other side of the equator. It all depends on what is going to give us the most comfort in that exact moment. Just like everyone else, we need our alone time.
9. We can't always pinpoint why we feel the way we do.
This can be super frustrating but despite all the instances I named above that cause us anxiety, we sometimes have no idea why we feel the way we do. Pinpointing the cause of our anxiety can be super difficult and sometimes there is no specific thing that triggered it.
10. Our minds are moving a mile a minute.
Our minds are constantly moving. Whether it's overthinking situations that are causing us anxiety, thinking about our anxiety, or wondering why we are anxious. Our minds rarely take a rest or break for that matter, it can be physically and mentally exhausting.
11. Our bed and home is our comfort place when anxiety strikes.
Crawling under our covers, digging our head into our pillow, and letting the tears flow is what a lot of times makes us feel "better". Of course, we all have our own individual coping skills as well, that may include music, venting, etc. Holding in your anxiety is often the worse thing you can do to yourself. So next time you hear somebody say that they are so anxious, you will understand that it's giving them some relief to get it out to someone. Then, when they proceed to lock themselves in their room you will know exactly what is happening behind closed doors.
12. We get anxiety over the fact the people close to us don't understand our anxiety.
This point I can't stress enough!!! Please let your loved ones with anxiety know you took the time to read this article. It can cause one so much anxiety to know that somebody doesn't understand why we act the way they do. It makes us fear you leaving us or not being able to put up with us. Like I said before, we have trouble letting people in so once we let you in there are several occasions when we are anxious over if they are going to leave.