"I ain't parkin' at it unless the meter green, homie. Haircut several months in-between, homie. Hit the motherfuckin' lights when I leave, homie." - Lil Dicky
Spoken like a true genius, I've taken inspiration from the man himself.
1. Only go out on the weekends.
Trust me, your body and bank account will thank you later.
2. Make your own drunk food before you go out.
It's basically meal prep... but for getting drunk.
3. Utilize your underclassmen for their swiping privileges.
One swipe will get you more than just a free lunch. Come equipped with Tupperware and a Nalgene to fill up on pasta and milk.
4. Get creative.
Don't have plastic forks? Steal some from the dining hall. Don't have napkins? Chipotle's got you.
5. Shop at Aldi.
This grocery store is a freaking life saver. You'll go from spending $70 a week to a mere $30.
6. Buy the off-brand... it tastes the same.
I know it may gross you out to be eating Great Value instead of General Mills, but besides the name value, you're not losing much.
7. Set a weekly allowance for alcohol.
It may get hard to refrain from buying 10 random people shots at the bar, but by sending your sober self out with only $20, you keep your drunk self from spending $200. Always a good plan.
8. Attend special offer nights.
50 cent slice night, 50 cent cheesesticks, BOGOs and free food before basketball and football games can save some extra snacking cash.
9. Buy in bulk.
If you've never heard of Costco or Sam's Club, here's your chance to take advantage of buying a 10 pound box of cereal that will last you for the rest of your life.
10. Separate a portion of your paycheck into your savings account.
You may think you're rollin' in the dough until you go out for the weekend and come home broke. It's a good idea to make sure that drunken splurges are backed up by some good old fashion saving.
11. Mooch off of any promotional event with free food.
The Summit is the queen/king of giving out free stuff just for a (fake) e-mail address. All it takes is a minute of your time and free Chipotle is at your finger tips.