1. The School Spirit
This is that one dude that is always abnormally excited about being in college. He wears school apparel to every party, and is constantly in a good mood; he's always acting like he's every random's best friend. He yells, "GO COLLEGE" on top of the coffee table, and anything pertaining to your schools sports teams. "SIOUX YEAH YEAH."
2. The DD's/Sober Sally
The DD's that really hate their lives because they're watching everyone have fun, or the ones who thought going to a frat party sober was possible. If you aren't on the same, "So sweaty, bumping into everything, become best friends with everyone, snap chatting drunk selfies" level, it's almost unbearable.
3. The Nice Girls In The Bathroom
The very drunk, very nice crowd of girls in the bathroom, who you make plans with that will never happen. You'll likely exchange numbers, take pictures together, and cry over boys, but you also probably won't ever see each other again.
4. The Too Lit
The one falling all over people, can't even make words, and is probably puking in the bathroom. Their favorite booze is Svedka, or Karkov, and they drink it straight… and that explains everything.
5. The One Who Tries To Get EVERYONE Drunk
Usually the guy or girl who walks around offering anyone and everyone their alcohol because they want everyone to get as drunk as them. They're like Oprah giving out cars, but in alcohol form. "You get a beer, and you get a beer, and you get a beer!"
6. Alessia Cara Wondering Why You're Here
These guys probably haven't been to a college party, and don't really know what to do, or they didn't realize they hated parties until just now. And now they're singing to Alessia Cara's song, "Here", wondering exactly what it is they're doing here instead of being in bed at home.
7. The Sob Story
Probably that girl that cannot stop crying, and ends up crying at almost every party for reasons no one knows. "Why am I crying in the club right now?"
8. The Dr. Phil
They go around budging in on everyone's conversations about broken hearts, and shitty professors, and attempt to resolve the issue for them by giving their drunk two cents.
9. Meathead
The guy who hits on everyone and thinks he's hot shit.
10. Girlfriend Of The Meathead
The meathead's on-and-off girlfriend eyeballing every other girl he talks to; she'll start up a girl fight with anyone who talks to him too long.
11. The Mom
The person who takes care of all the puking people, and cleans up all the messes. Sometimes they do the dishes and make food for people that they don't even know.
If you're drinking on campus: stay safe, be extra careful when crossing streets, never accept drinks from strangers, and stay in groups. Please do NOT drink and drive. If you need transportation, use a designated driver, or a taxi service, uber or lyft. Drink responsibly and with moderation.
