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11 Things That Should Never Have Been Pumpkin Flavored

I get pumpkin spice lattes, but this is completely different.

Megan Parker

Oct 17, 2016

Ohio Wesleyan University

11 Things That Should Never Have Been Pumpkin Flavored

Everfest.com

In the fall, everyone seems to go crazy for pumpkins, and I am all about that. I love pumpkin pie, pumpkin ice cream, and pumpkin scented candles. But there are some things that should never be pumpkin-flavored, and yet, every autumn more and more of them appear on shelves. Here are some of the strangest pumpkin-flavored things, which in my opinion just shouldn't exist.

1. Chewing Gum

Extra evidently has pumpkin spice gum, which is fine and all, but I personally would not want to just continually be chewing on pumpkin gum.

2. Vegetable Snacks

I'm not entirely sure what a vegetable snack is, but I don't think I want one and making it pumpkin spice-flavored isn't going to change my mind.

3. Spoons

Pumpkin spice spoons... I'm really not sure if it's actually silverware or candy or what, but I guess you're supposed to enjoy it with tea. I just don't think we need this.

4. Candy Corn

Let's be real. Candy corn itself is pretty bad, so maybe that shouldn't exist on its own anyway. Pumpkin spice candy corn should probably just not be a thing.

5. Triscuits

I see the serving suggestion has cherries and a piece of cheese on it. I have personally never craved cherries, cheese, and pumpkin all at once.

6. Chili Seasoning

I've never considered making pumpkin spice, well, spicy. And to be quite honest, I don't think it's a possibility I'd like to explore.

7. Milk

I've heard of chocolate and strawberry milk. But in spite of the fact that the carton says "old recipe" on it, I've never before seen pumpkin spice milk.

8. Sparkling Juice

I love sparkling juice, but I can't even imagine pumpkin spice juice. What part of the pumpkin exactly would one even get juice from?

9. Sweet Drops

I can't say I fully understand sweet drops, but they seem similar to sweetener packets. I can't think of any reason I would want my sweet drops pumpkin-flavored, though.

10. Bath Bombs

Bathing in pumpkin spice-flavored water sound completely unappealing and very, very sticky. I would feel unclean.

11. Dog Shampoo

I cannot make this stuff up. There is such thing as pumpkin spice dog shampoo. In case it wasn't already hard enough to bathe your pet, add in pumpkin scented shampoo that they will probably assume is food.

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11 Things That Should Never Have Been Pumpkin Flavored

I get pumpkin spice lattes, but this is completely different.

1. Chewing Gum

2. Vegetable Snacks

3. Spoons

4. Candy Corn

5. Triscuits

6. Chili Seasoning

7. Milk

8. Sparkling Juice

9. Sweet Drops

10. Bath Bombs

11. Dog Shampoo

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Because who understands your bitterness better than April?

1. When you have to provide an "interesting fact" for your first day ice-breaker.

2. When your professor is babbling on and on in his lecture.

3. When you edit your friend's paper and they get an A.

4. When it's 2 AM and you remember you have a test tomorrow.

5. When you finish taking the test and you're pretty sure you failed...

6. ...but then you get the test back and somehow passed.

7. When you've been up for 12 hours straight writing a paper.

8. And then you manage to stay awake in class the next day.

9. When you have to butter up your professor for an extra credit opportunity.

10. When you're assigned a group project.

11. And your group-mates are trying to chat about life instead of the assignment.

12. When it's your last class of the day and you're about to go home.

13. But then you remember rent is due tonight and the anger comes back.

Graduation is coming.

1. The classes you are taking are actually difficult.

2. You probably have a fancy internship somewhere.

3. You and your pals are all of a legal age to drink (even the late bloomers).

4. The future... what is that?

5. Apply, interview, rejection, repeat.

Struggling with school stress?

Sometimes it's not right, and we just don't care.

Because Chandler Bing should be everyone's spirit animal.

1. When you have to wake up early, because you have a 9 AM class.

2. When all of your friends are coupled up... except for you.

3. When you get really bored in class, and you want your professor to stop talking

4. When you're trying to impress the person that you like, or your significant other.

5. When you got drunk at the bars... again.

6. When you are single, and desperate.

7. When you talk with someone who you don't like.

8. When it's finals week.

9. When you don't feel like working out.

10. When you finally decide to go out for the first time in months.

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