At 4'11" and a 1/2 (yes, that half is very, very important), everywhere I go, at one point or another, the attention will always be directed to the fact that I'm the smallest person in the building. Usually, I'm pretty comfortable with my height but it gets aggravating when people constantly comment on my shortness, as if it was something I didn't already know. Seriously. You need to stop. You're not hilarious and just because you're taller by me doesn't make you any more clever. Here are 11 things short girls hear almost every day of their lives:
1. "You're So Short."
I mean, it's not like I look at myself in the mirror everyday or go to the doctor but thanks for the info boo, glad to know your eyesight works well.
2. "Oh, Sorry. Didn't See You There."
I might be missing that 1/2 inch to get to 5'0" but that does not mean I'm invisible. If you need better glasses all you have to do is go the doctor and get checked, it's that simple.
3. "Are You Tall Enough To Get Into Roller Coasters?"
I'm 4'11" and a 1/2 ok, not 4'7". I can ride roller coasters perfectly fine and have been able to since I was about 8, but thanks for your concern.
4. "Hahahahaha. Even That Little Kid Is Taller Than You."
Okay?
5. "You're Actually Pretty Strong."
As Shakespeare once said, "Though she be but little, she is fierce." My height and strength are not related in any way so keep on walking before I wipe off that surprised look on your face for you.
6. "How Do You Even Reach the Pedals While You're Driving?"
Look, it takes me a while and a few adjustments but with the right equipment I am perfectly fine to drive. I have an open position for a personal driver though, care to apply?
7."You're the Perfect Height. I Can Use You As An Armrest."
My head was not made to work as a leaning spot to rest your limbs. Do you see me standing on top of your shoulders because you're just the perfect ladder? No? Then I would rather you not touch me.
8. "You're So Cute and Adorable."
I'm not a child. After we're 8 years old, it gets annoying to hear this repeatedly. I'm a sexy adult, not some adorable naive child or a small little puppy. Now say it one more time and my fist and your face will have a nice little meet and great.
9. "What's the Weather Like Down There?
Oh my God. You are so funny. Seriously. Have you thought about doing stand up comedy?I mean, wow. You really got me there.
10. "I Wish I Could Be As Small As You."
Trust me, you don't. There's a reason surgery to become taller exists.
11. "Your Feet Don't Even Touch the Ground."
Seriously, you just keep impressing me more and more. I had no idea they didn't reach. I was just dangling them here out of pure enjoyment.