If you're from Fresno, there are some things you just know and have learned to love about where you are from, they are things no one else will ever understand. Here are just some of the things that people from Fresno County know and love. And if anyone ever asks, just show them this article!
1. The Big, Big, BIG, Big Fresno Fair....
Finish the sentence, come on. I know you can do it.
This is the big one for Fresno. This is the Disneyland of Fresno. "Have you been to Disneyland?" "No, but I've been to the Fair." All the 4H kids rejoice and the community comes together to show off their art, produce, and baked goods. We have all been to the Table Mountain concerts at least once. We know the horse races and have stopped by to hang out with Warren Armstrong at the ABC booth. And come on, we can't forget those cinnamon rolls, those things are God's gift to Fresno. He had to do something to make up for the insane heat.
2. Speaking of the Weather...
If you live in Fresno, you know that Facebook meme. The one where God is sitting in his kitchen and His angel comes in. "Hey God, what are you cooking?" And He responds, "Oh, Fresno." Yeah, that one. Fresno heat is not one to be messed with. It lasts from April well into October, sometimes longer, and rarely shorter. If you have lived in Fresno during the summer and didn't have a pool, you at least made sure you knew someone who did. Otherwise, you wouldn't have survived. And can we talk about the fact that one day you are wearing a scarf and down jacket, then the next you are trying not to be arrested for public indecency because it's too hot to even wear a bikini! You know it's bad when Fresno and Phoenix seem to be having turf wars on the Weather Channel.
3. Earthquakes that aren't really that bad, but everyone still loses their minds.
If you have a Facebook and live in Fresno, no doubt you have seen this meme too. And you probably shared it. Everyone freaks out when they feel the slightest movement of the earth. The slightest vibration and we know that we've just had an earthquake, even though the person sitting next to us says we are crazy. My Mom remembers when she was little, her school would tell her that one day California was going to have an earthquake so big that L.A. was just going to drop off into the ocean, and everyone in Fresno was hyped because they were going to have beachfront property. Even though we all seem to think we already do...
4. The beach is ONLY two hours away!
Morro Bay and Pismo Beach are a Fresnan's favorite places and it seems to be that only Fresnans know where those even are. Although the "Jewel of Morro Bay, California" is starting to become more famous because of "Finding Dory!" Thanks Disney! Yet, we mostly go to eat at the "Splash Cafe" because it's too cold and foggy to go into the water anyways. But hey, that clam chowder is to die for. And the coast is a totally cool place to get a tattoo, yeah we all have that one friend (or radio talk show host). I'm talking to you, Ray Appleton.
5. Speaking of famous news anchors Warren Armstrong, Nancy Osborne, Kope, and Graciela Moreno are names every Fresnan knows.
If your Mom isn't playing KMJ in the car and watching ABC30 or Channel 26 for the 5'oclock news, are you even from Fresno? These local celebrities are pretty beloved by their fan base. I remember one time my family saw Warren Armstrong in the line to "It's a Small World" at Disneyland and we were so excited! Also, everyone was so excited when ABC30 went viral because of a certain video at the Guardians of the Galaxy: Mission Breakout press event. If you haven't seen this news gem please do yourself a favor. Our guy Cory James even got to appear on GMA. Everyone loves when Fresno gets famous.
6. The things Fresno is famous for...
"The armpit of California." I would argue that we are at least the belly button. Equally smelly and something that everyone is at least a little curious about. It's no secret that we aren't the safest place on Earth. You don't wear red south of Shaw, you just don't. As the car theft capital of the United States, we don't exactly get the best rep, but you have to give us a little credit, we have a lot of diversity. Even our smells are diverse, it might be a cow, it might be a body. It's Fresno, who knows! Hey, at least we have a lot of Dutch Bros. and IHOP's. And have you seen our arts scene? Just take a walk in the Tower District (just try not to go past 9 pm).
7. Let's not forget the Fresno State Bulldogs!
Every Fresnan loves to scream "Go Dogs!" And no doubt you sang "Who Let the Dogs Out" at least once at a Fresno State game. The Bulldogs are cherished by Fresno County residents. Remember when a lot of people hated the Raiders? Well, we all love them now because they got Derek Carr, the sweetheart of Fresno. "Are you a Raiders fan?" "No, but I love #4." It's called the Bulldog effect. Are you really from Fresno if you haven't gotten at least one picture with Time Out and Victor E. Bulldog III?
8. Every Target has a special name.
Fresno loves its Targets. With seven in town, you would think we wouldn't need another store. But we all have our favorites and they each are known for their own special attribute.
Riverpark: The one everyone goes to. It's good for candy when you head to Edwards for a movie and can't spend $25 bucks on popcorn.
Willow and Herndon: The mucky-muck Target. But this one has a special place in my heart because I work at this one.
Shaw and Clovis: The not so cool one, but good for Christmas Shopping.
Shaw and Marks: The one everyone forgets about. Wait, I thought that was a Wal Mart...
Shields and First: The ghetto one.
North Riverside Drive: You didn't even know this one existed until you drove out there and said, "Whoa! There is a Target here?!" Chances are, you still didn't know because you haven't been over there lately.
Blackstone and Bullard: The not so ghetto, but still kinda ghetto one, but good for all the car accessories you need after you got swindled into buying a car across the street. Chances are you probably stopped in after you waited 6 hours for donuts once Fresno finally got a Krispy Kreme back. You know who you are.
9. There is never any parking. Anywhere...
Best burger in town? Forget about it. Doghouse can't even park itself in there. Do you want to go to the super Wal Mart so you don't have to watch someone get their diaper changed in the middle of the aisle? Forget about it. Do you go to school at Fresno State? Good luck! Hope you're in good shape and can walk a mile to class. You would think with over half a million people in Fresno and 100,000 in Clovis they would make some more parking stalls. Have you ever heard that old saying? "Welcome to Riverpark. Where there is no river and no place to park." It's the reason our freeways are so empty most of the time.
10. Clovis really is our better half.
All of the old people and cowboys live over there. Everyone flocks there for the summer concert series and the Clovis Rodeo. The Rodeo is the slightly less cool version of the Fresno Fair. But Boot Barn rejoices because all the fake country girls are going to need their boots so they can get wasted and listen to country music once a year. Clovis also had the first Habit Grill and Friday night Farmer's Market during the summer. Also, can we talk about how Clovis has four schools that all basically have the same name, but everyone just accepts it? At least Buchanan had the right idea. They also have the super strict dress code, but their extracurriculars really make up for it.
11. There really is no place like home.
Everyone always says they can't wait to get the hell out of Fresno. But they always seem to end up back here. No one from Fresno can tell me that when that skyline appears on the 99 North as you are coming back home that you don't get the warm and fuzzies. Downtown Fresno will always be there to welcome you home.
