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15 Reasons Fall Is The Best Season

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11 Surprising Things Every White Girl Is Looking Forward To This Fall

A spooky selection of this season's sinister stuff.

Susanna Parkhill

Sep 26, 2016

UNC Charlotte

11 Surprising Things Every White Girl Is Looking Forward To This Fall

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Fall: The peak season of white girl fashion, cuisine, and culture. Do you think you can already guess every item that will be on this list? Think again.

1. Hay

Hay is every white girl's dream. If you're looking for a birthday or anniversary gift this fall, try hay.

2. Death

Nothing says "crisp autumn day" more than some fresh death.

3. Loafers

Who doesn't love a good pair?

4. The great mole rat

Dream pet, am I right? These guys mate in the autumn, so keep your eyes peeled!

5. Cummerbunds

Honestly, the most attractive thing a guy can wear in this chilly fall weather.

6. Disembodied limbs

They're on every corner.

7. Sloth from "The Goonies"

He may be ugly, but he'll grow on ya!

8. Corn labyrinths

If you can't figure out how to get out, I guess you just die!

9. Sacrifices to the pumpkin spice god

It's not pretty, but it's a necessity.

10. Leaf

Self-explanatory.

11. The anniversary of Grandpa Ralph's murder

October 31st, 1972.

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1. Thank you for being the one I can always count on to be honest.

A true friend will tell you if the shirt is ugly, or at least ask to borrow it and "accidentally" burn it.

2. Thank you for accepting me for who I am.

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Your eyes widen in horror as you stare at your phone. Beads of sweat begin to saturate your palm as your fingers tremble in fear. The illuminated screen reads, "Missed Call: Mom."

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Recommended for you

11 Surprising Things Every White Girl Is Looking Forward To This Fall

A spooky selection of this season's sinister stuff.

1. Hay

2. Death

3. Loafers

4. The great mole rat

5. Cummerbunds

6. Disembodied limbs

7. Sloth from "The Goonies"

8. Corn labyrinths

9. Sacrifices to the pumpkin spice god

10. Leaf

11. The anniversary of Grandpa Ralph's murder

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Here are just a few of those things.

Take the time to thank that one friend in your life you will never let go of.

1. Thank you for being the one I can always count on to be honest.

2. Thank you for accepting me for who I am.

3. Thank you for teaching me what real love feels like.

4. Thank you for always making sure I'm safe.

5. Thank you for going through things with me.

6. Thank you for teaching me to take care of myself.

7. Thank you for going out of your way to make me feel supported.

8. Thank you for always being there to back me up, even when you know I'm wrong.

9. Thank you for constantly pushing me to live up to my potential.

10. Lastly, thank you for making such a huge impact on my life.

It sucks, but you’ll make it through

1. Please just be seasonal allergies

2. I must not have gotten enough sleep last night

3. I’ll just take a little nap

4. Oh no, I have so much due tomorrow!

5. I’m fine, I’ll just sleep it off

6. Do I have to be responsible today?

7. Ugh no, I can’t actually be sick

8. Alright, I’ll take some medicine and I’ll be fine

9. This is the worst day of my life

10. Mom?

11. She was right (like always)

12. Too bad you're busy and can’t take the day off tomorrow

13. You think about taking the day off, but realize you have like three tests

14. You think you're actually going to be sick forever

15. Finally, you're better!

Sleepovers are not a thing. They're just not.

1. You only ask things once.

2. Seriously, you only ask once.

3. When you do muster up the courage to ask your parents for something, you creep around and wait until they’re in a good mood.

4. Before you get that final yes, you have to go through an interview.

5. If you ever got “the eye,” you knew you were screwed.

6. You were always the first to leave your group of friends when hanging out.

7. If you say you will be home at a certain time, you better be home at that time.

8. Seeing a missed call from your parents sends fear and horror through your veins.

9. If relatives are coming over to the house, your room better be clean.

10. You are careful about what jokes you share with your parents.

11. "You’re not an adult until you turn 18! You can do whatever you want then!"

12. If plans change while you’re out, you better text or call.

13. Don’t talk back. Ever.

14. When you’re called by your full name, you’re in deep trouble.

15. Don’t make them call your name twice.

16. Sleepovers are not a thing.

17. Despite all of these things, you know your parents love you.

For better or for worse

1. Pets

2. Mornings

3. Mistakes

4. Cooking for yourself

5. Hosting

6. Taking care of yourself

7. Holidays

8. Roommates

9. Keeping focused and getting stuff done

10. Cleaning

11. Social life

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