As a member of a generation whose world revolves around technology and social media, I never understood why my parents would repeatedly ask, "Why don't you just call the person, instead of texting them?"
Call them? Call? And say what?
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I genuinely believed that texting was the more convenient and faster route. As college has progressed, I've come to the realization that texting actually sucks for 1,568,478,248 reasons... and then some.
1. Over Analyzing.
"I just got a text that said 'hey.' Do I reply "hey!' or "heyyy"? I think those are both too much. Maybe I'll just say 'hey.' I feel like that period is too serious. I could ask what's up... I don't know." [20 minutes later replies with 'hey.']
2. Misinterpretation
"We should hang out sometime." What does that even mean? At one point in time, this phrase had to genuinely mean, "I think you're a cool person and I just want to get to know you." But it could definitely be the text version of the pre-invitation to Netflix and chill...
But seriously... who knows?
3. Read Receipts = Enemies
"Uh oh. It says read and I didn't get a response! Oh my gosh, what did I say wrong?" [Proceeds to read back through the entire conversation to figure out where the conversation began to go downhill.]
Any possible outcomes of read receipts go one of two ways.
1. If you text your close friend who has their read receipts on and doesn't reply, it's not a big deal. Because there is no shame in sending a followup text calling them out whilst simultaneously harassing them until they respond.
2. If you text somebody you are not close with and don't get a response:
Your blood pressure rises, you want to crawl under a rock and never see them again. Then you analyze why you never got a response for the next 25 years. (The second reaction is generally a response toward the opposite gender.)
4. "K"
"The text just said 'k.' Yup, they hate me."
It's an automatic invitation to assume that the person hates you. Please note that some people actually just use the letter "k" liberally. Don't take it personally.
5. Some People Take SOOO Damn Long To Reply
"It's been four minutes and I haven't gotten a response... what could they possibly be doing?" Some people just take two plus hours to respond to "yes" or "no" questions. Some people are purposely ignoring you.
6. Double Texting
"I already sent one text, does that make me psycho if I send another one?" Stress level: 2007 Britney. Some people won't mind and others are going to think you're a crazy, psycho, needy stalker who doesn't know texting limits.
7. Long Text Messages Are Almost Never Good
[Opens up a text to see a novel of a message.] [Recalls every bad thing done or said within the last 3,650 days.]
8. Text Lingo Is Cringe Worthy
Lol bc I rlly can't rel8 2 ppl that write lik dis.
It almost takes more effort to figure out abbreviations for words/phrases, than it does to just type it out. The future generations spelling abilities concerns me. Lolz FML.
9. Face-to-Face Communication: 0/10
[Tries to say hi.] [Approaches person.] [Becomes a mute.]
Say hi. Introduce yourself. Ask the person about their likes/interests. Repeat. But for some reason, people have lost all concept of conversation, because it's much easier to type words on a screen.
10. "Just call them"
"Wait... what do I say!? I can't just call them!" Sometimes ordering a pizza over the phone gives me anxiety, but that's only because I really don't want to mess up my order. It's going to be OK if you call. You'll probably even get a response faster.
11. Texting Just Ruins Everything
"Yeah... texting actually sucks."
It's time to come to terms with the fact that my parents preaching to me about face-to-face communication is actually the better route.
