Gavin is known as one of the most relatable faces on the internet, providing countless memes that allow people to connect through sharing them. Knowing that, I think he can help us (those living with mental illness) illustrate some of our daily experiences with those around us. Take it away, Gavin.
1. When someone tells you, "if you smile you'll feel better!"
This is the oldest trick in the book. Yes, in healthy people, the act of smiling may actually heighten mood, but smiling doesn't cure depression. The illusion that feeling better is that easy breeds guilt in those who struggle to.
2. When you try to be positive but you're still plagued with existential dread.
Sometimes, living with depression/anxiety is all about putting on a show so that no one asks you "what's wrong?".
3. When you're having a bad day and you want to eat your feelings and you have to choose between health and comfort.
Wanting to eat some comfort food but feeling the societal pressures related to body image can be so frustrating and exhausting. Talk about food guilt.
4. When you're having a panic attack and someone gives you the totally new advice of "calm down!"
We've never heard that one before! If only I had tried that, instead of choosing to feel like I'm going to die! It's totally that easy!
5. When you feel a slight pain in your chest and you start your WebMD research to see if you're dying.
For many people with anxiety disorders, the thought of being ill is paralyzing. We like to be one step ahead and investigate symptoms that we don't even really have. For us, chest pain = heart attack = dying.
6. When you meet new people and try not to scare them off with all your psychological baggage.
Again, we've often got to put on a show for fear people will judge or abandon us because we're "too high-maintenance" or "too much of a downer".
7. When you're a depressed pessimist and someone tries to shine their shiny optimistic light on you.
As a depressed, introverted pessimist (myself), I know that when people offer some oppressively optimistic insight, I'm put off. Sometimes it's nice to have people meet you halfway rather than make you feel like you have the wrong outlook on life.
8. When someone invites you somewhere and you don't want to let your friends down but you have a date planned with a bag of chips and some good ol' fashioned isolation.
For some of us, socializing can seem like the most exhausting, unpleasant, even terrifying thing we could possibly do. Just know that, though we may not always be around, it's not because we don't want to be.
9. When you're depressed and trying to keep the slightest problem from setting you off.
We often know when we're in a bad place and know what we need. Yes, emotional support is crucial, but so is recognizing when someone has their guard up and maybe, just maybe, not trying to pry your way through. Sometimes people just need their space.
10. When people are asking you about your life plans and you haven't even done laundry in weeks.
The simplest tasks can become daunting and often overwhelming, so we may avoid them at all costs. This is why little victories are so important to recovery/maintaining mental health.
11. And finally, when your mental fatigue is getting to you, and you imagine going home and laying down.
Me time is so important to many who are battling mental illness, especially because many with depression/anxiety are often more introverted by nature. We're not lazy, we're just not always energized by "adventure." Encourage us to get out there, but be aware of when we need a break and let us do what makes us comfortable.
Thank you, Gavin. You never let us down.
