Looking back on the last year of my life, there are many things that I am glad that I did and there are also many things that I wish I'd done or that I wish I hadn't done. As I look forward to this next step in my journey (going to college), I am also reflecting on the things that I would change if given the chance. Here's what I've come up with:
1. Cut toxic people out of my life
So much of my time and energy senior year was dedicated to people who frankly weren't great to have around. I wish I'd allowed myself to cut off toxic relationships before they escalated as far as they did.
Recommended for you
2. Applied to my dream school
At the last minute, over Christmas break, I decided to pull my application from my dream school. I hadn't finished the essay yet, the deadline was rapidly approaching, and I was fairly sure I wouldn't have gotten in anyway. Looking back, I wish that I'd taken the chance and submitted the application.
3. Spent more time with my family
Senior year, I went to school, worked, went out and slept. There were some weeks when I wouldn't see my dad for days at a time because he left the house so early and I got home so late. My sisters and I also reached a point where we were never seeing each other, and it left us all a little lonely and upset. Looking back, I wish I'd invested the time in spending more time with my family, even if it was just dinner once in a while or a weekend trip to the mountains.
4. Actually tried in physics
My report card from my physics teacher actually says, "Capable of a better grade. Test grades low." I barely scraped by in that class, earning myself the first grade lower than a B of my entire academic career. While the course content was fairly difficult and I did have a hard time grasping some of the ideas, there is not a doubt in my mind that I would've been able to get a higher grade if I had only tried and applied myself.
5. Been more spontaneous
I am the type of person that likes to have a plan and likes to have that plan followed. I am the friend that picked up everyone on Friday nights; first Ellie at 7:42, then Maddie at 7:56, then Harmony at 8:17, all so we could make it to the movie at 8:40. It was a wonderful system and I learned to excel at timing things accurately, but after a few weeks, the boring routine got old. I wish that I'd taken some time senior year to throw caution to the wind and do more spur-of-the-moment things, without coordinating every last minute of the day.
6. Saved money!
Long story short: I made lots of money working senior year. I spent almost all the money. I have basically nothing to show for all the work I did. I also have no money management skills under my belt. I wish I'd saved some money or at least learnt how to budget so that I wouldn't be left wondering how I was going to make it to the end of the month with $40 and a quarter of a tank of gas.
7. Learned how to say 'no' to things without feeling bad about it
I don't know how to say no to things. In an average week, I'd cover three or four shifts at work, all at times that were not a part of my availability. My friends and coworkers know that if they come to me, I'll drop everything to help them out. While reliability is a good skill to have, I was burnt out by February and, for the sake of my mental health, I wish I'd known how to say "no" without feeling bad about it.
8. Practiced good college study skills
I've always been that kid that never had to study. I'd walk into a test that I didn't know about and walk out with a solid grade. Even if I didn't need it at the time, I wish I'd developed good study skills before my bad habits come back to bite me in the fall.
9. Gone to more school events
Throughout high school, I went to a grand total of zero Homecomings and only one sporting event that wasn't a football game and that I wasn't playing in. I wish I'd gotten my friends together and gone to a hockey game or the poetry slam or a swim meet so that we could've engaged with and been a part of the community.
10. Not have worried so much what others thought of me
This applies to every aspect of my life, not just my senior year. I often get so wrapped up in everyone else's opinions of me that I forget to do things that I actually enjoy. I wish I'd had the confidence to tell some people to back off and to make decisions for myself only.
11. Spent time and energy doing things that actually matter to me
At the end of the day, there are only so many days left in high school and left in the last year at home. I wish I'd been choosier with how I'd spent my time and done things that I enjoyed rather than just jam-packing my schedule for the sake of not being bored.
Senior year is an incredible time to hang out with your friends and discover yourself. It's how you spend it that matters.
