I swear, if I hear another person say that my hair is cute curly I will freak! Hey curly-headed ladies out there! You feel me? It may just be me, but I despise my curly hair. Thanks dad...really appreciate the genes you gave me! I know it is something that is out of my control, but come on! There has to be some way to tame the main!
Here are 11 problems I have with curly hair... I'm sure you other curly-headed gals out there can agree with me to some extent!
1. It literally does not grow...
My hair grows outward, but not downward! By the end of it, I look closer to a tater tot or a tumbleweed than a human being! Whenever it does grow, you happen to go in for your hair appointment and they chop off all of your hard work. At that point, I give up. If only we could work it as good as Nicki...#slaying
2. Bottom curls that aren't seen are perfect ringlets, while the rest is a floppy mess...
I don't know about y'all, but my hair has perfect ringlets in the places where it isn't seen than in the places where it is! Super frustrating! The rest of my hair falls flat or looks like a failed perm. Blah!
3. Humidity is your worst friend...
Don't even get me started! I would much rather live in cold weather than hot, humid weather! The second I take the time to straighten or curl my hair, to make it look cute it has to rain or something! Such a bummer because this is when the frizz emerges!
4. You can't sleep on it wet without you waking up looking like Medusa...
I am guilty of this because I tend to straighten my hair more than I leave it curly. I tell you, my hair is a hot mess when I wake up! There is nothing adorable about it! I apologize to my future husband who has to wake up to that every morning. Two words: giant hairball!
5. When people ask you why you don't leave your hair curly...
Look, I'm sorry I don't want to look like a frizzy-noodle head every day! Trust me, there is nothing glamorous about having curly hair. Unless you have long, gorgeous ringlet curls! As for my half-assed curly hair there is nothing great about it! If you like it, do you want me to shave my head and give it to you? I would gladly do so!
6. The amount of time you spend looking for a product that works wonders for your hair...
I don't know about you ladies out there, but I think I have used every product made by man to make my hair the gorgeous, shiny curls without being crunchy or gelled down! Can't be good for the hair, but hey...the hair industry must be making a mint off of me! Literally, just keep dumping product in your hair, maybe the next one will work!
7. The amount of time it takes to make your hair straight or any other non-curly hairstyle...
Let me tell you...I have days where I don't feel like touching my nappy-hair, so I just toss it up in a bun, throw a headband on and call it a day. There are days we just want to have cute beachy curls or glamorous straight, shiny hair! Do you blame us! But guurrrllll, it takes forever and a day to achieve this look! If you want it curled, first you have to straighten it and then curl it! It is a process-in-a-half. Is it worth it? Probably not, but we do it anyways! We are all slightly afraid our hair will fall out in the process...poor girl.
8. When you blow-dry your hair, you look like a lion...rawr
You may kid around and sing in the brush like you are Farrah Faucet or Beyonce, but damn...that hair is definitely a sight to see! In all reality, you probably look closer to young Hermoine Granger. The frizz...I'm having nightmares. I have to stop!
9. You were equated to be Shirley Temple's look alike when you were a little tike...
Okay, yes, she is adorable. But come on! I was a cute child, but not that adorable! I swear...it's the curly hair. The only thing that made me look even remotely close to Shirley. (Okay...maybe I could have been a stunt double)
10. When you don't try, your hair looks bomb, but when you do it flops horribly...
You literally step out of the shower, throw your hair in a top knot and look ready to walk the runway. Of course, this day happens to be the day that nothing great is happening. You are studying in your room like a hermit and no one will see this gorgeous human being! How sad! *Cue the fan, take selfie*
11. You have a constant love-hate relationship with your hair...
You can't help what God has given you, but there are days where you would trade it in for anything else! Some days you wouldn't know what to do without it! Love-hate relationships make the world spin on its axis. Rock your curls and be proud to own them! Rawr...okay that's the last one I swear!
