100 is a big number. This is the 100th article I have written on Odyssey. Reaching this milestone does feel good, but this also calls for a time of reflection. It's been nearly 2 years since I joined. What has changed during those 2 years?
When I first started writing, I was struggling mentally. My classes? Failing. Work? Failed my job so bad I had to quit. My living situation? Dorm contaminated with cigarette smoke. Fortunately, my family and friends stuck with me throughout that time. Anytime I needed to vent or too simply cry/mentally breakdown, I felt safe to do so with them. It actually helped, but there was still a part missing from my life.
My writing began well before Odyssey. During high school, I used to write a little bit on my Tumblr blog. Random thoughts and ideas just ran wild through my head. Why not write about them? Joining the Odyssey a few years late was a good place to continue that. The things I write are intended for attention or for popularity. Everyone asks me if I get paid for writing on the Odyssey, and I proudly say no. Heck, none of my content is intended for fame. I only post my Odyssey articles on social media because I have to. My mentality doesn't focus on the audience. Rather, it focuses on the content itself. I write to record.
Personally, I feel that my first 40 or so articles that spanned from November 2016 to June 2017 were my peak writing period. That's when my content truly felt genuine and a reflection of my thoughts. After that, I was basically writing to meet deadlines and have something on the resume, something to talk about. By then, I also started a second Twitter account to write on a day-to-day basis. The account is a different record of reflections, thoughts, lessons, ideas, and quotes. The routine was simple. Daily writing on the Twitter and weekly writing on Odyssey. The clear difference between them was obvious, one was mandatory while the other was not.
Like I mentioned before, the next 60 articles were just written to fill a quota. There were some exceptions, but at that point, it still did not feel the same. This was mainly because of my failure to balance work and life. Even by Fall 2017, I couldn't get a stable grip mentally. Class didn't get any easier and my outside work and activities were stressing me out more rather than provide comfort. Despite all that, I kept writing to see if I could get the spark again. The search kind of indirectly kept me sane too. That's another reason I continued to write. Spring 2018 did allow for some mental recovery after a few difficult semesters, but the articles were missing something. Their purpose. The search for that purpose continues on now even as I write this, but how I can find it again? Perhaps reaching this milestone is my first clue.
Overall, these 100 articles have helped me through some tough mental periods. I guess you could say they are a reflection of my college career. There were certainly a lot more lows than highs, but I have absolutely no regrets. The lows make the highs the way they are. As I begin my final year of college, nothing will truly surprise me anymore. The only goal I have this year (other than graduate of course) is to just to relax and enjoy being a student one last time.