Here are a few things I have learned when it comes to determining if they are the right one for you.
You are extremely comfortable with one another.
There is no better feeling than being completely comfortable with your partner. Think back to the days either before you got together or shortly following Did you have a awkward stage or did it just become natural feeling? As I've talked to guys and hung out with them over the years, I have always found myself seemingly walking on eggshells trying to make sure I'm the best guest I possibly can be. It isn't any easier when you are hanging out with them for the first time at their parents house. Not only are you trying to impress your significant other, but trying to impress the family as well. Everything changes when you find your special someone. Yeah, you might go through that slightly awkward phase, but believe me, it fades quickly. Before you realize it, kicking off your shoes and throwing your stuff on the same chair or counter every time you walk in the door just becomes normal. You know where the food is, you know where most things go, and you'll even begin to help with daily things like dishes and laundry without thinking much about it. Also, normal bodily functions just don't phase either of you.
Your partner's family is still your family.
Photo by August de Richelieu from Pexels
Whether you are together or not, from the first time you met one another's family, they were instantly like your own family. In my case, I know that even after a breakup, their siblings are still so kind hearted, their nieces and nephews are like family, their parents still care, and their grandparents are like my own. Of course your own family is important but you realize that the health and wellbeing of your significant other's family begins to matter almost as much if not as much as your own blood. Together or not, you know your families would do anything for the other person because they love you just like their own.
You're still best friends.
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Despite not having a title with one another, you are still really close. There is a common saying that says something along the lines of, being best friends after a breakup means you were only ever best friends, or those individuals still love one another. I don't think we are best friends because that's the only thing we were meant to be. I think we are best friends because deep down, there is still love for one another in both of our hearts. Losing a boyfriend is one thing, but losing your best friend can be seemingly the catastrophic end of the world.
Simple daily things remind you of them.
If you're anything like me, you can be walking through Walmart on a grocery trip and run across that little, insignificant thing that you can't help but smile when you see it. (You thought of it just now and smiled). I can walk down almost any aisle and immediately think of memories with those items incorporated. You see smoked paprika? I see scrambled eggs at 2am. You see popcorn kernels? I see the popcorn maker exploding with popcorn in my kitchen. You see sour cream? I see countless arguments at the dinner table about why or why not sour cream should exist. If you're online, maybe you see an advertisement for their work or something they enjoy. That advertisement for that car part you know they have been wanting or the missing piece to something they are building, it reminds you of them. Sometimes, you just have to send it to them.
Both parties would do anything for each other.
This right here is the best feeling in the world. Just knowing that if you were to have a flat tire, be locked out of your house in the middle of the night, or have something catastrophic happen any time of day, you know from the bottom of your heart, that person is going to be there for you. Maybe it can't be physically but you know they will call you on the phone just to ask what's going on or try to calm you down. You can always count on them to support you in whatever it is that happens in your lifetime. Maybe you drank a little too much last night and you need a ride home. With one text or phone call, you know they will be there.
Even though you don't see each other everyday, you pick up where you left off.
Distance Relationship
There are few people in your life that you can go days, weeks, months, maybe even years without speaking to one another and you can pick right back up where you left off as if no time has passed at all. If even through a breakup, you still remain close, you still hang out on occasion, and there's no negative feelings towards one another, you either never loved one another or you never stopped loving each other. Honestly, the second one happens way more than people care to admit and it's heartbreaking to see two people who are meant to be together make the wrong decisions and never end up together again.
When are together, even though your split, it's like nothing has changed.
Breakups suck. Period. But being able to spend time together one on one with each other after going through a breakup, and feeling like nothing has changed is one of the best and most heartbreaking things in the world. When you were together, you achieved a certain level of comfortableness with one another and if you got to the practically married stage, it's difficult to even think about being that way with anyone else. Everyone knows the at first jitters where you feel like you have to be perfect, but let's face it, no one is perfect. After your split, you might feel as though all that work was for nothing when in reality, nothing ever changed. When you spend time together, that comfortableness just carries on.
You are willing to wait as long as it takes for them to come back.
When you know you've met the one, you realize in your mind and heart that there will never be anyone out there more perfect for you than that one person. Even though they may not show it all the time or at all, you know deep in their heart, they still feel love towards you. Maybe they need some time to figure out who they are individually before you can figure out who you both are together. Maybe they just want to have some time to be young and dumb without hurting you. Maybe you both just need a little time to grow and mature before being together again. You can play the 'what if?' and 'maybe' game all day but think about things in a broader spectrum. You are willing to wait for as long as it takes for them to say they miss you, they still love you, and want to try again.
Even though they broke your heart, you know for a fact that they will come back.
Man Looking at Watch
Heartbreak with a significant other is painful enough in itself, but heartbreak with your best friend, significant other, or the love of your life is even more difficult. If you believe in a higher power, you may ask them for direction or patients to keep moving. Or, maybe you believe in fate. Whatever you believe, you know in your heart that one day, they will see all the things you have done or are doing for them to keep them in your life. One day they will recognize you never stopped outwardly showing them how much you love them, even when they may have denied it. You know that they were meant to be in your life without a shadow of a doubt. It's not over. It's simply a detour.
You love them unconditionally.
You can't create incredible, unforgettable memories for months or years on end and simply just forget them or hit the delete button in your camera roll. You will always replay these memories in your head over and over. If they truly loved you, they will do the same. Just because someone doesn't show their feelings, doesn't mean they aren't there. Sometimes, you just have to dig a little deeper, walk in their shoes, and try to see things their way. Despite any negative words, negative actions, petty arguments, or even a breakup, face it. You love this person unconditionally. You would go through the heartache again just to be with them if that's what it takes. You were thinking of this person the entire time you were reading, and now you feel the urge to talk to them. Tell them how you feel, sort things out, take your time. You never know, your forever someone may be just waiting for you to say the first words. Trust me, you know deep in your heart, you've found 'the one'.
