I have worked in food service for a total of almost six years, and with every shift I work, I am increasingly astonished at the lack of common sense exhibited by restaurant patrons. To be fair, there are many incredibly considerate patrons who behave appropriately but unfortunately, there's always a few people who mess things up. From customers who ask you to read the nutritional information for every item on the menu, to some truly horrifying experiences cleaning bathrooms, I have seen it all (I hope). Here are some tips I've developed from my experience to make it clear (if it wasn't already) what's not acceptable restaurant/cafe etiquette.
1. Let your children use their macaroni and cheese to decorate the walls.
I know that it is sometimes hard to pay attention to your kids and that maybe your broccoli cheddar soup is just so fantastic your attention is momentarily shifted from making sure that your kids behave, but when you are at a restaurant, please for the love of god, do not let your children utilize their macaroni and cheese as a form of wall art.
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2. Assume that I will pick up your dishes for you.
Unless you have a legitimate reason why picking up your dishes might be out of the question for you, walk over to the bus bin and set them down just like everyone else in the cafe. In case you were wondering if you were supposed to do that, the answer is yes.
3. Try to stay past the time we are closed.
This one really gets me. If you go to a restaurant and you know that they close at a particular time, please just leave as close to that time as possible. The people closing the store down need to clean, and they can't do that if you are still coveting your dishes and standing where we need to mop, wipe, sweep, etc. We have a closing time for a reason, I have a life and (occasionally) places to be.
4. Complain that we don't have a certain food item two minutes before we close.
If you come into a restaurant/cafe etc. several minutes before they close and they don't have something, and then throw a fit because there is no dark roast coffee at 9:58 p.m., maybe you should question your life skills/organizational choices? Also there's a Starbucks next door, utilize it!
5. Argue with an employee about whether or not they just brewed something.
I had a woman once ask me to brew her another pot of coffee after she literally watched me bring out a brand new one and set it on the counter. She said that she didn't like getting the dregs of coffee, to which I politely explained that I completely understood and that coffee had just been brewed. Not good enough for this woman apparently, as I was glared at the entire rest her visit.
6. Act like it's a personal attack that we changed the menu.
I once had a woman walk out of the store when I told her that French Onion Soup was seasonal. Literally, she just walked out. Who knew that particular soup was make or break for the entire cafe experience? It was a shock to me.
7. Go to a pizza place and then be mad that we can't make something entirely gluten-free.
I understand that allergies are tough, and it seems like it would suck to be gluten intolerant. That being said, it is slightly unreasonable to expect that a pizza place with an open air kitchen (that has windows so that you can see in, I might add) is going to have anything that is completely and utterly gluten free.
8. Use water cups for soda (at least not in front of me).
Look, everyone does this, let's be honest. However, to use your water cup for soda right in front of me is a little much. I appreciate the bold gesture, but if you're going to "steal" something, maybe be a little bit more subtle?
9. Ask me to make other customers leave so you can have their table.
When I worked in a pizza place that had a typically long wait, this man literally went up to another table and stared them down after I told him I couldn't just tell them to leave. Imagine eating your dinner with your family, and having a random old man just staring at you. Not pleasant right? It's a cautionary tale.
10. Yell at hostesses (in general) but also that are clearly not even 18.
This was my manager's biggest pet peeve at the pizza place where I worked in high school. If you are a grown man yelling at a 15-year-old because you don't have solid enough time management skills to figure out whether or not you'll be able to get pizza before your movie, do not take it out on an innocent hostess. What does that really say about your character? Maybe take a minute and reflect on whether or not a grown man/woman should be yelling at someone less than half their age. We all love pizza, but you've got to have a little bit more chill than that.