Toward the end of your spring semester, you start getting really excited about all the things you will be able to do with all the free time you are about to have this summer. You create the perfect bucket list with an activity for every day of the summer. You are going to wake up early every day and hit the gym, make your self a big, healthy breakfast, and then go on the adventure of the day. Or, you are going to lay in bed and binge watch Netflix and eat your body weight in chips and ice cream and think about all these things you planned on doing but haven't attempted yet. Your going to start next week, though, right?
1. Get in shape.
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You told yourself in April you were going to start going to that gym you have been making monthly payment to for the past two years. The total of three days you spent at the gym in April oddly wasn't enough for you to have a six pack, and now you are a week away from vacation, and there is no point in starting now just to take a week off. So, you embrace the fact that you will look like a beached whale this year, even though you told yourself the past five years that you would look hot on the beach next year. Now, it's July and summer is almost over, and you have accepted the fact that you're are not going to look good in the 15 crop tops you bought for yourself in the spring, thinking you would be skinny by now.
2. Eat healthy.
Along with hitting the gym twice a day, you probably planned on eating 100 percent organic, vegan diet consisting of fruits and vegetables you were going to grow fresh in your own garden. You had a "healthy recipes" board on Pinterest and enough ideas to eat something different for every meal, every day of the summer. Instead, you ate ice cream for breakfast and pizza for dinner every day.
3. Read a book.
You probably bought yourself a couple self-help books and set them on your desk for when you have more free time in the summer. Your books are still sitting where you left them four months ago, and your life is still a mess and purchasing the books was the closest thing to helping yourself that you will ever do.
4. Get tan.
You put on a pair of shorts for the first time and realized you were Casper and promised yourself you would be the tannest you have ever been this summer. You even considered purchasing a tanning package to get a nice base tan for the beach. Now, you are two months into summer and a half a shade darker than you were in December. It's OK, though, that is what they make sunless self tanner for. Let's face it, your too lazy to put that on, too.
5. Go on adventures.
You probably have a collection of screenshots you took over the winter months of "the perfect road trip," "10 waterfalls you didn't know are in your state" or "the clearest place to look at the stars." You sent them in a group text to your friends, and they were all totally down. You had planned out the perfect pictures you were going to take and put on Instagram, captions and everything. You were totally convinced this summer was going to be a summer full of adventure. All you did was go to a local park that you have been to 100 times before and took a picture holding hands with your best friend on the swings.
6. Pick up that hobby.
You were going to be an expert guitarist/master painter/extreme yogi. The only new talent you picked up this summer was eating chips off your chest without using your hands so you can scroll through Twitter while simultaneously watching Netflix.
7. Save money.
"I'm going to work every day and save all my money for something great," you told yourself, and now you look at all the pointless things you own like three self-help books, two guitars, 20 lotions and sprays from Bath and Body (they were having a sale) and everything you would need to be a professional painter. Oh, and you only have $4.76 in your bank account.
8. Craft
You were going to successfully complete all those DIY projects you pinned on your "in my spare time" Pinterest board, and let's face it, you have had plenty of spare time and you have completed zero projects. At most, you looked online (because going to stores is overrated) to consider purchasing the materials you need for the project and realized crafting is expensive, especially for someone who only has $4.76 in their bank account.
9. Catch up with old friends.
You tried to make plans a couple times, but you were both busy, and let's face it, if it doesn't involve eating ice cream out of the tub without pants on, you are not interested.
10. Get your life together.
You were going to re-organize your room, put everything in those cute DIY storage bins and donate the clothes you haven't worn in four years. You were going to figure out your major and plan out your entire future. You never made those storage bins, you never donated those clothes (plus you bought a ridiculous amount of new clothes) and it looks like dropping out of college is your best plan right now.
I might not have a hot body or my life together, but I did finish 10 different series on Netflix, and that counts for something, right? Maybe next summer.
