With advances in modern medicine, we can prevent many things. The one thing you can’t prevent is aging. No matter what, you will grow old. You’re dying from the second you are born. We’re always going to get older. And both society and culture will constantly remind us. Here’s a list of things that will guarantee to make you feel old.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer Reboot
Do you remember “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”? Did you watch it? Were you a fan? Do you at least remember when it was on? It doesn’t seem that long ago. It probably feels fresh to a lot of us. But it’s not that fresh, because there is a reboot in the works. So that show is older than you think. Joss Whedon is not happy. He said that he expected it to happen, but he didn’t expect it to happen in his lifetime. If that’s not enough, here’s some facts that will also make you feel really old… The movie came out in 1992. That was 24 years ago. The TV show first aired in 1997. That was 19 years ago. The finale aired in 2002. That was 13 years ago. Charisma Carpenter is 46. So is Kristy Swanson. James Marsters is 54. Feel old yet?
The Pretty Reckless
There is a great metal band called The Pretty Reckless. They have produced many amazing songs, such as: “Messed up World (F’d up World)”, “My Medicine”, “Make me Wanna Die”, “Heaven Knows”, “Going to Hell”, and many others. The band has a female lead singer. The lead singer often dresses in dark provocative clothing. Sometimes she wears nothing at all. In the videos, she gets very sexual. In “My Medicine”, the lead singer is surrounded by drugs and naked pornstars. She’s very wild and erotic. She is 23 years old and her name is Taylor Momsen. Do you know who that is? You should, because 16 years ago she starred in the live action adaptation of “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” as Cindy Lou Who. You watch her videos and see a beautiful carnal woman wearing provocative leather clothing, and then you realize that she was the little girl from “The Grinch”. Does that make you feel old?
Xbox One
Who doesn’t love video games? Do you play them a lot? Do you remember your first one? Was it an Atari, an NES, a Super Nintendo, or a Sega Genesis? Have you seen the Xbox One? The things that this thing could do is absolutely amazing. You can play games with your friends. You can watch or record live streams. You can download games right onto your Xbox. You can chat with friends. You can watch Netflix. You can scroll through the internet. It also has voice commands and facial recognition. It literally has a built in Cortana. The things that this thing could do are limitless. Could you do any of this with your Super Nintendo? Does it seem as fun as playing “Oregon Trail”? That must make you feel old.
Wrecking Ball
Miley Cyrus was America’s sweetheart. She has been acting and performing music since she was a child. Her first role was on her father’s show, “Doc”, in 2001 when she was 9. She began starring in the show “Hannah Montana” in 2006 when she was 14 years old. We watched her grow up. Hannah Montana ended in 2010. During the next few years, Miley got a little wild. Then in 2013, she took her clothes off and hopped on a wrecking ball for the music video to her hit song “Wrecking Ball”. We watched her go from a cute little girl with goofy teeth to a naked very sexual woman with a sledgehammer. How old does that make you feel?
The Simpsons
How old were you when you first saw “The Simpsons”? You were a kid. You may not have watched it regularly, but everyone has seen it. You probably remember how old you were when you first saw it, but do you know how old the show was? “The Simpsons” is still on today. And it has been on since 1989. The show is currently on its 28th season. Now ask yourself how many years that you’ve been watching it. Do you have a number? Does it make you feel old?
SD cards & Blurays
Do you remember your home videos from when you were young? They were filmed on cassettes. That’s something they don’t make anymore. Cassettes only last 20 years, so a lot of yours may not be good anymore. After a while, cassettes got smaller and turned into 8mm cassettes. Now 8mm cassettes are gone too. Even those are obsolete. Now we have something called SD cards. SD cards can hold up to 512GB. Micro SD cards are even the size of your pinky nail. Compare that to your floppy discs. We also used to watch movies on cassettes. Since then we have had laser discs, DVDs, and now Blurays. Blurays play films in 1080p. They even come in 3D. They have most recently released 4K Blurays. That has to make you feel old.
Britney Spears
Do you remember the cute teenager in a school uniform and pigtails trying to convince us that she wasn’t that innocent even though we didn’t believe her? Yes, I’m referring to Britney Spears, and she didn’t just do it again, but she’s done it many times. Britney Spears is now 34 years old and has two children, who are 10 and 11. She was divorced in 2007 and lost custody to her two children. Her sister, Jamie Lynn Spears, is now 25 and has one child. Makes you feel old, doesn’t it?
Movie theaters
Do you remember going to the movies as a kid? Do you remember waiting in line, hoping that the movie didn’t sell out, getting your freshly printed tickets, waiting in line to get popcorn, trying to find a good seat, and then sitting in the uncomfortable seats that were sometimes broken or sticky? Well, you don’t have to do any of those things anymore. Now you can immediately buy your ticket and pick out your seat all in one click. Then the ticket is emailed to you, and the usher just scans your phone. You don’t need to wait in line at all anymore. Now there are theaters called “Dine-ins” where there are waiters who will bring you your food and drinks like in a restaurant. And now the seats are extremely comfortable. They are clean. They are made of leather. And they recline. Now the film screening quality is better, and you can even watch most movies in 3D. That has to make you feel old.
Justin Bieber
Justin Bieber is an adult now! He is now 22. And you are old.
Back to the Future 2
Do you remember “Back to the Future Part II”? In the second movie, Doc Brown and Marty McFly travel to the future. In the future, they encounter flying cars, hover boards, holograms, self-fitting and drying clothes, rejuvenation clinics, robots, food hydrators, and many more amazing inventions. They travel to October 21st 2015. That is when they witness all this. This is what they considered “The Future” in the eighties. That was over a year ago. Do you remember being a kid and expecting 2015 to be the future? It’s now almost 2017, and we’re still waiting. Now you feel really old, right?