1. Things being symmetrical and in order are something minuscule, but you think about it way too often.
Anything and everything has its appropriate spot, if it is not in order... Well, prepare for an anxiety attack. A few seconds to make sure everything is symmetrical and aligned? I wish - try anywhere from five minutes to almost an hour.
2. You have a set of rituals that you complete - and if you do not do it... Well, prepare for all the bad things that could happen to you.
You have your set of rituals to complete before you leave the house every day. Finally, you complete them, but it does not feel right. So, be prepared to be late to where ever it is you need to go to.
3. You tend to hoard a few things.
Sure, there is no reason for you to keep that broken bracelet that you made, but you might need it one day. So, of course why not keep it.
4. You hate when something is not set to an even number.
We are talking about the car radio volume, the volume on the TV, having an even number of objects and the list goes on and on. You get the idea.
5. Your closet is organized by color, shade and clothing item.
A tedious task - but hey, at least it is easier to find things, right?
6. Good luck telling someone you have OCD.
Either they will think you are a complete weirdo or you are lying. Then you start obsessing over what they think about you.
7. If you wear makeup it becomes a hassle. Good luck trying to do those five minute makeup looks - try two hours.
Everything has to be perfectly lined and symmetrical. This includes eye shadow, lipstick, eye brows and eyeliner. You constantly wipe it off and reapply to get everything even, but deep down you know it will never be perfect.
8. You check things constantly, even though you know it is perfectly fine.
Dish washers, lights, door knobs, appliances, wall outlets...
9. Night time is the absolute worst.
If you hear the slightest noise, you repeatedly check the entire house until you find out what caused it. Then you try and fall back asleep, but you remember you did not do your night time ritual. So good luck getting any sleep tonight.
10. When people think they have OCD because they like to be organized and clean.
You know you just want to scream.
Oh! Hey look! This ended on an even number!
1. You have such a great time staying at home with Netflix, the Internet and some good music.
It is not an issue talking to people online or via text message, but forget about trying to do that in person. Your words get muffled and you cannot find the words to say in a conversation. It is way easier when communication is not face to face.
2. You hate when you are forced to attend a party.
As soon as you get to the party, you already assume everyone is staring at you and judging you. You try and plan an escape route, or at least a good enough excuse to leave. The worst part is being introduced to someone you do not know. You want to be friendly, but you are terrible at striking up a conversation, which leads you to one word answers. Then eventually that person will leave and find someone else to talk to. Unfortunately you feel left out, and sadly it was your fault.
3. You friends usually consist of two people and that is more than enough.
You refuse to seek any new friendships, because you are content with the ones you have. Even if you do not see them fairly often, it is totally fine. Hey, even one of them probably does not like people too!
4. You bring lunch to work and eat in the car away from people.
It is not like you hate your co-workers, you would rather just not talk to them. You do not want to be mixed up in their conversation and have to try to find the right things to say. When they invite you to go out, you always find an excuse not to go. Luckily, they get the hint after a while and stop inviting you.
5. You are always tired and you even look like a zombie.
Having a mental illness is stressful on the body - whether people believe it or not. There are nights when you are up all night worrying and you do not know why. Therefore, you suffer the next day.
6. You have learned to tune everything out when more than one person is speaking.
You have learned to shut everything out and use your own body as a safe haven. This is only temporary, but boy does it work wonders! It may come off as being rude and boring, but deep down you want to be a part of the group.
7. You constantly think about the worst case scenario and harp over it for hours on end.
These things will probably never happen, but what if they actually do? This sends your anxiety into over drive. This puts you back into isolation from the world and you really do not know how to become positive again. Thinking happy thoughts definitely does not help.
8. You wish there was a magical way for people to understand your anxiety and how you are feeling, but there is not.
If you try to explain it to them, you think they are judging you right away. However, you know they are probably going to be sympathetic. You just refuse to put yourself through that torture.
9. Having a pet is the greatest thing ever!
You can tell them anything and they cannot respond or judge you. Need I say more?
10. When you are out and you see someone you know, you find the best way to avoid being seen at all costs.
Taking a long route or hiding are the best options. If they end up seeing you, you say hi and walk away frantically.