I recently had an eye-opening conversation with a good friend of mine about the journey she embarked on to find herself. She was able to recognize that her soul was broken and is now trying to repair it. Now, I know a lot of people don't buy that spiritual stuff, but it has some potential real-life application. She told me that you have to destroy yourself before you can build yourself back up. Being a senior in college with the stress of having to leave my safe college bubble and start being a real human (because, face it, college students are not real people), along with all the other stress that come with it, I have found myself beaten down and unable to identify who I truly am. I went into college so sure and confident with my identity, and at this point 4 years later, I don't even recognize myself. I have finally realized this loss is attributed to my constant worry of those around me over myself.
1. Everyone's stress builds up on top of your stress, making you 10x more stressed.
It can be hard at times to not want to be a good friend and listen to your friends vent but try to remember that they are not your problems to stress about. All you can do is lend an ear and advice, and they'll figure out the rest on their own.
2. You forget about the little things in life that you used to enjoy.
Remember when you used to ride your bike around Passion Puddle when it got warm out? Or when you used to do bi-weekly Zumba classes? Or experimented in the kitchen with new recipes? What happened to that?
3. You sacrifice your own happiness for others' happiness.
You can be happy, too! Happiness is not something that is mutually exclusive.
4. You end up doing things you don't want to do.
If you're not enjoying yourself, stop doing it. It'll only add to your stress.
5. Your stress starts to effect your daily routine such as sleeping.
When your daily activities and routines begin to be affected by others, it is time to reevaluate what you're doing with your life.
So what are we going to do about it...?
6. Start telling your friends that you can't be the sole fixer of their problems.
You are not Bob the Builder--so don't even try.
7. Take a step back from making everyone happy.
Start saying no to people. You don't owe anyone anything.
8. Make a list of short-term and long-term goals and aspirations.
This will help you restart focusing on things you want to accomplish and the person you want to be in the future. Keeping your eye on the prize will only yield positive results in your future. Remember: this is only a guideline, use it to guide you into future endeavors.
9. Do things for YOUR OWN happiness not for anyone else's.
I think this one is pretty self-explanatory.
10. Remember: You are your own worst enemy; don't let it overcome you.
You are the only person who can bring you down, no one else has as much power to do so than you do. Defeat your own demons and stay positive in order to live a happy and healthy life.
Starting at a young age, we are taught to be selfless, but the truth is, it is crucial to be selfish sometimes.