I’ve always been small. I come from a family of very tiny people where 5’3’’ is considered tall. After a long struggle with this, I have grown accustomed to the incorporation of step ladders in most parts of my life. However, when I was younger it really bothered me. I was too young to understand quite how genetics worked and always hoped I would be taller by the time adolescence came around. I thought that, by some miracle, I would not take after my miniature parents and would instead tower over the rest of my family. Obviously, I was very wrong. Womanhood didn’t quite hit me full force like it did for some of my friends. The height and curves never came and I am convinced that, without makeup, I could still probably pass for a 12-year-old. Despite the fact that my physical stature puts me at a significant disadvantage in the fashion department, I have chosen not to wallow in my minuteness. I rather embrace it and have come to terms with the following list of things I will never, ever, ever be able to pull off:
- Boyfriend-Style Jeans: I’ll be honest with you, this realization stung a little bit, but I have come to understand that they don’t work for many people. I send my congratulations to Karlie Kloss and the four other people in this world who actually look good in them.
- Polo T-Shirts: Not my first choice anyways, but “Glamour Magazine” says they are making a comeback. When I wear them, I look like a child.
- Jean Vests: Oh, how I have often lusted after this cute summer trend. I gave up when I realized how scrawny my arms look in comparison to the bulky material.
- Statement Necklaces: For some people, I say “the bigger the better” when it comes to statement jewelry. For me, on the other hand, a large adornment on my neck makes me look like a might actually tip over.
- Parachute pants: Does anyone actually wear these off the runway? Maybe not, but when I wear them I look like a clown.
- Maxi Dresses: I have not completely given up on this trend yet, but finding a skirt that doesn’t drag six inches behind me is almost more trouble than it is worth. These skirts spend more time dusting my kitchen floor than they do flattering me.
- Shift Dresses and Shirt Dresses: If you have long legs, than these are for you. For some, this silhouette is classy and timeless. However, if you are me, you will look like an oddly proportioned lamp.
- Layered Clothing: Less is more when it comes to this trend. Oversized sweaters and scarves drown me and I often require a helping hand to dig me out of a sea of fabric.
- Boxy Tops: These hide any hint of a waistline and make a short torso appear even shorter. Steer clear.
- And last but not least…Flowy Pants: Maybe the saddest one of all. This adorable bohemian trend was not developed with petite gals in mind. They will drag on the ground whilst making your legs look like stumps. Alas, we must find something else to wear to festivals this summer.
If you are teeny like me then this list probably depressed you a bit. Fear not, little people! We can wear heels for every single occasion and nobody can say anything about it. Make friends with the stiletto and hold your head high. We are less likely to have back problems and always make it to the front row of group pictures. Being short is actually the best.
