Dear fellow Tigers,
Congrats! We've all made it through the winter and to second semester. Another syllabus week is upon us. I'm as excited for this syllabus week as any other sophomore in college. I mean...what's not to love? Short classes, party themes that start with the same letter as the day of the week they are on, and a bunch of free food. As much as I enjoy this glorious week, there are certain things that make me want to rip my hair out.
1. Instagram captions that have the word "sylly" in them
This might be a personal thing but I cannot stand this word. It was a great pun the first hundred times I saw it as a freshman. But c'mon people, it's time to retire this word from social media. Also, it's ten times worse when I hear this word in real life.
2. Professors that keep students for the entire class
They know that 75% of their class is hung over and any information we are given will probably be erased (due to the brain cells we'll kill after the Tequila Tuesday party tonight). But a part of me has to admire their sass.
3. More than one jersey or "shots around the world " theme party in a week
This is another one of those things that got old after freshman year. There is only so many times I can wear a Lakers jersey to a party until I feel like I am disgracing the name of a great sports franchise.
4. Every single seat in class being full
I cannot concentrate with 300 people sniffling all at one – even if the professor is showing us videos of things blowing up. Part of me just wants to fast forward two weeks when it's only me and the skater boy who sits two rows behind me attending lectures.
5. The amount of money I spend on late-night food
3 a.m. me and 3 p.m. me have two different appetites. That means I will probably order upwards of five pizzas this week. That being said, I will not be financially or emotionally stable enough to check my bank account next Friday.
6. Professors that don't go over the syllabus the first class
THIS IS WHY IT IS CALLED SYLLABUS WEEK. The odds that I will actually look at the syllabus are the same as the odds that I won't go out tonight. That's zero just to specify.
7. The judgmental looks people who didn't go out the night before give me
Yeah, I'm wearing last night's make-up...so what? At least, I made it to my 8 a.m. You people should be giving me a round of applause instead of a round of eye rolls.
8. Knowing about the tidal wave of work that's going to hit you next week
All those readings and practice quizzes you've been putting off? Those will hit you like a tsunami, my friend.
9. All the pictures you want to upload to Facebook but know you can't
As awesome as that picture of you and the ice luge is, you know that's not something your grandma wants to see. And the last thing you want is a talk from your mom about why she's paying your tuition.
10. The last party on Saturday when you realize syllabus week is over
You'll find me crying in a corner holding a cup. Just pray that my tears don't ruin the taste of my jungle juice.
So enjoy syllabus week while it lasts, Tigers.
