Y'all, I can officially say since December 3 that my name is Morgan Baylie Martin and I am married to one of my favorite people in the world, my best friend and husband, Christopher Brian Martin II! I am stoked to finally be a wife and live with this man of mine. So, my gift to you will be the list of the 10 things I learned the first 10 days of marriage and I have transcribed them into 1 part lesson learned, 1 part advice for you.
1. Marriage in the movies is not the same as what it is in real life. The movies are full of romance, fake laughs and unrealistic sex where as marriage in our case has been filled with real belly hurting laughter, some romance and some passing of the cough syrup because we were both sick and awkward sex.
2. Sex is awkward. I realize I said this in #1 but I must emphasize it again. It is not the sweet quiet kissing scene you see in the movies and frankly, I love my God and the way he designed it was meant to be filled with communication, laughter, awkward moments and so much love. It is far better this way, believe me.
3. Dinner is not always perfect, on time nor delicious but the sweet person that shares in those moments with you, makes it worth throwing away grocery money in exchange for Domino's pizza.
4. Rearranging the house together is both a chore and joy but let me tell you this, if you are like I am...decorate with your best friend. Not your husband. Your husband will likely want it perfect and to teach you exactly how to do it the right way, your best friend will let you remove and redo the nail in the wall at least 6 or 7 times.
5. No matter what it is over, that first fight will hurt. Not because your husband will become a monster or because he will yell at you or you will storm out of the house, but because your souls and lives are now one and the very moment that you are mean to him...your own heart feels it in a very deep way.
6. Apologize. Apologize like you did the very first time you realized Jesus died for you. Apologize for snapping in the kitchen, for being rude or for the way you insensitively went to sleep without spending time with him. With that being said, move on. Walk in forgiveness in the same way that you did when Jesus first washed away your sins. That man loves you and always will, abide in that.
7. No matter how long you have been married, for us it has been daily, someone is going to mention babies. Smile, make eye contact with your spouse and breath. Babies are a gift but not a next step by law. If you want to wait, wait. If you don't want to have them, don't. If you want them now, well get naked.
8. Sleeping beside each other is fun, warm (for one of you) and so not like what the movies show either. It is much more like two people fighting over the covers even though there is enough for both of you and one person trying to discretely wake the other up so that the day can begin without being obvious about it. Still though, it is so sweet to sleep next to your best friend every single night.
9. Stay home if you can. My husband and I decided to spend the majority of our first 10 days at home together and some of our close friends came over, but for the more part it was just us. This was so needed. It gave us a lot of chances to watch tv together, talk about the wedding and catch up on the much needed relaxing together that wedding planning stole from us.
10. When addressing your husband, say "Husband" not babe or doll or sweetie. Just Husband. When addressing your wife, say "Wife". Not baby, sweetie or hunny, say "Wife". It has quickly caught on between us and it is a sweet reminder, fun thing to say and just awkward enough to work for us. Try it, it may work for you too!
