Marriage is a huge commitment, one of the oldest in history! It’s life-changing and you’ll each have a lot of growing to do, but it’s fun nonetheless. Here are some tips I’ve learned after being married for a little over a year.

1. Don’t go to bed angry.

You’ve seen this everywhere. It’s the most common advice given to married couples. Some are skeptical of this “rule” of marriage, but it honestly works. Even if it’s 2 a.m. and you both have to wake up at 6, stay up and talk it out. Take a moment to reflect. If you can’t solve the issue right away, make time to do it later, but forgive each other before you close your eyes.

2. It’s normal to argue.

Using phrases like “you never” or “you always” while pointing the finger of judgment down onto your spouse can be hurtful. Even if there is an issue, try to speak positively towards your spouse. This doesn’t mean beating around the bush or ignoring the issue. It means politely giving each other constructive criticism that will help your marriage in the future.

3. Have fun together.

Marriage comes with responsibilities, but remember to have fun with each other! Go on dates, watch movies at home, or take a spontaneous trip. Do things together that make you smile.

4. Your spouse is your best friend.

Think of the best day you ever had with your best friend — sleepovers, inside jokes, endless laughter and good times. It’s like that, but with your spouse!

5. It’s OK to have differences.

I like to listen to music in the car. My husband likes to listen to podcasts. I have learned to appreciate and enjoy podcasts with my husband, and he has learned to appreciate my love for music.

6. Be your spouse’s biggest fan.

You’re the best person to encourage your spouse. Always lift him/her up. Support and encourage their dreams and aspirations. Along with that, don’t let them give up. Be the kick in the butt they need sometimes.

7. Don’t bottle up your feelings.

Whether its joy, frustration, sadness, or anger, always communicate your feelings with your spouse. It will lead to better understanding and fewer misinterpretations.

8. Talk to each other.

It’s the 21st century, which means technology is everywhere. Use it to your advantage and text each other during the day. But also take time to turn off the devices and enjoy each other’s company.

9. Share hobbies.

It’s important to find something to do together that you both enjoy. It’s a great way to bond with each other and have fun at the same time.

10. Make time for yourself.

Time with your spouse is important. Time with yourself is equally as important. Take time to get ready in the morning alone, read a book in the afternoon, or binge-watch a Netflix show while he’s out with the guys.

Above anything else, love each other! In everything you do, do it in love.