Looking back to my high school and middle school years, I think of how much I wish I had more freedom. All of my other friends could come home whenever they wanted, never had their phones taken away, and never had restrictions on who they got to see and when. I can't even begin to count how many times I wish my parents were less strict with me. Although, if there is one thing I would thank my parents for, it is being strict. It has taught me so much about myself and how to make decisions more responsibly than if I would have decided to do everything on my own. Here are some of the things having a strict parent has taught me.
1. Your parents are your parents. Not your friends.
Your parents put you on this earth to care for you and make sure you don't die. Your friends were put in your life to fill in the gaps of your life, to care for you, make you smile, and be someone you trust and confide in. They are someone you can tell things to that you cannot tell anyone else. Your friends can be so close to you that they are practically family, but your parents should not be so unstructured that they are more your friends. You would never have the structured support you need from them.
2. You learn how to have a well developed conscience.
Yes, you are supposed to make your own decisions to learn and I agree with that. Although, being able to avoid the more detrimental mistakes like drinking way too young or losing your virginity way too soon can be a life altering choice that was prevented by having your mom or dad say you have to be home by a certain time. My parents are overprotective because they had way too much freedom and did things they wish they never would have. They just want the best for you so you have no regrets.
3. You learn self control and how to be goal oriented.
Ever since I can remember I was always in a routine to finish my homework before dinner and make sure I went to bed at a decent hour. These small habits have carried through my entire life and have helped me realize the importance of my own health and well being.
4. You always have a strong support system that cares about you.
With your parents being solely focused on being parents instead of making sure they're your friend as well your friend's friend, you are able to have a closer bond with them. I still go shopping with my mom and we get our nails done, but I can go to her for serious life advice as my mother and not as one of my friends. They will always be your parents and people whose shoulders you can cry. Parents will never judge you, while friends are more likely to come and go.
5. You will always have their voice in your head even when you begin to make your own decisions.
Even now I find myself thinking about what my mom or dad would do during situations where I am either lost or even unsure. If my parents were not as structured with me then my gut reactions would not be nearly as strong. With their guidance I have learned how to make good decisions by following my own instincts.
6. You are able to read people much easier.
There is a reason your mom did not want you hanging out with certain people. Your parents could read your friends better than you could. After those types of people were out of my life, my mom would sit and talk to me about how she could tell who they were and what their intentions were. Due to those experiences and lessons I can now see people's true intentions much easier than if I just had allowed people to walk all over me.
7. You are more confident in making mature decisions later in life.
Even though I was not allowed out as much as my other friends growing up and I didn't have a lot of the same experiences they did, I have learned how to make my own decisions as a responsible adult. I am able to use the little voice in my head of all of the advise or rules my parents would give me on how to be successful. I have made my own edits to those rules of course, but I have been able to prioritize how I structure my day to what I have learned from them.
8. You may rebel here and there, but you will definitely learn from it.
People say if your parents are too strict then their children will rebel and I agree with that. Although, in my case, I have not been to the extreme because my parents were not extreme with how strict they were. All of the times I went against their advice and rules I immediately realized why it was wrong. The structure of their parenting gave me reasons why things were not good to have in your life or why they were bad decisions overall. If I had just did what I did without their guidance it might have taken me quite a few times to learn that same lesson it took just that one time to learn.
9. You learn to act your age.
If parents are able to separate their role as parents and friends then they can teach their kids how they should act at certain ages. Being their friend means you are treating them as adults as well as treating yourself as a child. Your image to them will mold and will show that being an irresponsible adult is acceptable from a very young age until you have your own kids. This can create a never ending path of childhood and immaturity that these kids can not get away from.
10. You learn how to act around people of authority.
It teaches you how to have respect and manners, and how to treat those superior to you in life. I have learned to open doors for anyone and everyone. To give your seat up for any elders near you. How to treat any boss I have above me and how to address me in a respectful manner. It has set me up to be a successful adult and are things I will carry with me for the rest of my life.
I could not thank my parents enough for making sure I didn't do anything dumb enough to hurt myself, my life path, or others. I look at young kids at concerts or festivals and thank my lucky stars I did not have the parents they probably do. I leave the house in clothes that make me look presentable and do not go do irresponsible things with my friends to the point that it would mess up my life. Looking back now, I would not have asked for my parents to be any different while raising me.
