Okay I feel no shame in admitting that I am a frequent shopper at Target because it is a magical utopia of awesomeness. I go there way too much (JK, there is no such thing as going to Target too much). As a self-proclaimed expert on all things Target, here is a brief synopsis of the Target experience:
1. You walk into the store and make a face at the security monitor (I mean there's no "People of Target" website, so you should be fine).
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2. Checking off items on your list... you have a "de-ja-vu" moment and feel like you were just here (That's because you were, and you'll be back next week, sweetheart. Don't kid yourself).
3. There's always one thing on your list that they don't have in your size or they are out of (Guess you'll just have to come back).
4. You spend time in sections with trinkets you're not going to buy, but have fun trying them on anyways (i.e: sunglasses).
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5. You stop by the shampoo section but can't remember if you have enough or not so you go ahead and get some. (Better add some conditioner too just in case, and maybe toothpaste?)
6. You stroll down the food aisles and throw things in your basket like Oprah. “YOU'RE for breakfast!" “YOU'RE for dinner!" “YOU'RE my comfort food!"
7. Then you spot a $5.00 classic movie in the electronics section, and get really excited because you haven't seen that movie in SOOOO LONG.
8. You make your final rounds to make sure you didn't forget anything and grab a cart instead of a basket because you bought 500+ things in addition to your list. (it was more of a guideline anyway!)
9. You approach the checkout desk wincing and hoping the clerk won't judge the pile of items you've just unloaded onto the scanner. Then you proceed to give her 5 giftcards from your birthday you forgot about. (Thinking “sorry, but that's what they're for.")
10. You walk out feeling accomplished, lugging your absurd amount of purchases, and drive away only to realize you forgot something. It's okay though, you'll be back next week.
