1. What are you going to do with your life?
"Yeah, so I just chose this major because I don't have a plan for my life." No. There are actually so many opportunities for jobs if you graduate with a degree in English. An incredible amount of businesses need someone that can write really well, and English goes hand in hand with communication skills. This field probably has more opportunities than any other.
2. Why wouldn't you want a job that makes you more money?
For a lot of us, English is our passion, and we aren't in it for the money. Also, when we become really successful writers or super high up the food chain in businesses and you can't find a job in your very small, specific field, we will ask you the same thing.
3. Can you read my essay for me?
I mean, I can, but if I read it I will probably have a lot of corrections and it might ruin our friendship.
4. Can you write my essay for me?
No. No. No. You can write your own essay. First of all, it won't sound anything like you, and second, I am not an English major solely so I can do favors for people to get them ahead in life. You will never learn to do things on your own.
5. Do you read like all the time?
I mean, yeah a lot of us love to read and do it as much as possible, but we are just as busy, if not more busy than others, since we have so many papers to write. However, being an English major doesn't mean we all love books. A lot of us may, but not all. English is so much more than reading and writing.
6. Oh so you're like a "grammar Nazi" aren't you?
Sometimes, yeah. Of course we don't try to be, but if you aren't using proper English, we will probably lose all faith in humanity. It isn't hard to speak properly. We have learned how to since birth.
7. What is there to like about writing?
Again, we don't all love to write, but if you do, it's a great way to get out our emotions, and to express our opinions. Writing can be very enjoyable, no matter the topic.
8. What did your parents think when you told them that you wanted to be an English Major?
What do anyone's parents think when they find out their children's major??? They should be really supportive, and if it is your passion, they will know you can be successful through whatever you do.
9. You're going to have such a hard time finding a real job.
Again, this is probably the degree that gets you almost any job. Of course, for engineering, architecture, math, and other specific career choices, you need specific degrees, but even within those businesses, you can get a job writing reports, or you can be a teacher, author, etc. The list goes on. Also, we don't all work at Starbucks. We would spell your name right.
10. Isn't that just like general studies?
It is not at all. While people taking general studies dip their toes in a little of everything, we are taking 3+ English classes a week, or even a day. We have History of English, History of Literature, Poetry, Shakespeare, Writing Studios, and many, many more classes. If you don't like English, you will not survive.