“He really does like me I know it, he’s just going through a lot right now...”

Girls, we put ourselves through so much more pain and heartache than we should. The sad thing is we could avoid pretty much all of it if we would just use our common sense and accept the fact that some guys just aren’t gonna like us. That doesn’t mean we’re any less awesome, just that our awesomeness isn’t appreciated by all. Let’s stop putting up with any of the following actions because let’s be honest, we know what we deserve, and it sure ain’t any of this crap:

1. He doesn't initiate conversation.

If a guy wants to talk to you, he will talk to you. If you feel like you’re the one always working at keeping the conversation going, it’s probably because he doesn't have any interest to. Try being the one who doesn’t respond for once, see if he does anything about it.

2. He doesn't ask questions.

Even if he’s carrying on a conversation, who’s to say he’s not talking to you like he would his 80-year-old next door neighbor? If a guy likes you he will ask about you. What are your interests? What’s your family like? What are your goals and aspirations? If he sees a future with you in any way he’s going to at least want to know the basics.

3. He makes you feel stupid.

You are awesome. If a guy has you spending any amount of time feeling like you’re not good enough, or has you watching every word that you say – move on. When a guy likes you they are going to be nice to you, no exceptions. Sure it’s OK to joke around and pick on each other, but don’t put up with anyone that puts you down, even if it’s not intentional.

4. He doesn't compliment you.

I know not every guy’s style of flirting is to tell a girl “sugar how you look so fly." I mean there is definitely more to a girl than just her looks. With that being said, if a guy likes you he will find a way to compliment you in some form or fashion. It may not be all the time, or may be in a way such as "hey, I like the way you're not too terrible all the time." Either way, it will happen. If that’s not happening, why would you want to be with them anyway?

5. He doesn't ask to hang out.

If a guy’s into you, he will want to see you. There’s nothing more to it. It’s OK for you to be the one asking to hangout on occasion, but he needs to be the man and not only ask to see you, but plan to see you.

6. He only asks to hang out at the last minute and/or late at night.

Don’t be that girl who spends her Friday night waiting around for the guy to call at 11 p.m. asking if you want to come over. You have a life, he should understand that. If he wants to see you he should have the decency to ask ahead of time, not when he’s finished with any other plans he may have already had. You are not a last resort.

7. He can't commit.

I understand there are events in life that cause people to not want a relationship at the time. They get busy, they don’t think they’ll be a good boyfriend right now, they’re just getting out of a relationship, etc. That’s all fine and dandy, but if a guy really likes you he’ll do what he can to make it happen. "Busy" is another word for "asshole." "Asshole" is another word for the guy you’re dating. You deserve a freaking phone call.

8. He has nothing but excuses.

Again with the commitment issues. So they don’t trust people very well, or their last relationship was bad, or maybe you’ve done something to make them unsure about you. If a guy is truly into you, he’ll get over it. And if he doesn’t, you should. Because he should realize your worth and not want you getting snatched up by someone else who comes along. End of story.

9. He makes you feel bad.

No guy should ever make you feel bad about yourself, your life, or anything that you have ever done. They have no right to do anything but uplift you and embrace the person you are. If you’re spending more time feeling down about yourself and your past decisions than you are feeling encouraged and wanting to better yourself, he is not the one for you. If a guy likes you, he will see the best in you, and want you to do the same.

10. He doesn't act like he likes you.

You would think this would be an obvious one, but sadly it’s not. As girls we are so good at twisting guys’ words around and holding onto the tiniest, itty-bitty, finite amounts of hope that he gave us last year when he said he “cared” about us. If a guy isn’t showing he likes you now... he most likely does not like you now. It doesn’t matter what he said before, because his mind needs to be sure every single day. You don’t need that unreliability.

So what have we learned? Listen to your brain, not your heart. Because your heart wants to see the best in people. And that’s so great, but not when it comes to shady guys who, in the end, only want one thing. Life is hard enough as it is without choosing someone difficult to share it with.