Summertime is a time filled with lounging by the pool, digging out the cute summer clothes and living to the fullest with no cares in the world. Unfortunately, for us bigger-chested women, we must plan accordingly to these changes of weather. While summer is my favorite season, it is also the season of keeping my chest in check. So far, it has not gone accordingly, and probably never will be.
1. Crop tops will never be the top for you.
Good luck trying to cover even one boob with a crop top, let alone both.
2. Boob sweat is a constant struggle.
Today's forecast: 100 percent chance of boob sweat, and it looks like it is here to stay.
3. Strapless clothes are never going to be for you.
Sometimes I think I should do strapless dresses, but then I think, "Hmm better not".
4. Beach Day, a.k.a. Flash Everyone Day
And you swear up and down it was not intentional, but no one believes you or your chest.
5. You get to do that fun thing where you have to buy an XXXXXXXXXXXL bikini top and a small bottom
And you are left looking like a swimsuit-confused whore.
6. Life jackets will not be there for you.
Life jackets will actually be the death of you because they will suffocate your big chest — nice.
7. Dressing to keep cool will be your worst enemy.
Sadly, while others get to wear low-cut shirts and tank tops to escape the heat, you automatically look overtly sexual in everything you wear. Your V-neck looks more like some "da club" outfit on you, instead of a cute summer ensemble. It feels like the girls are just going to pop out no matter what you do.
8. Buttons on shirts are little buttons of Satan.
No matter how many times you button up your shirt, there will always be that one that pops off. Usually it happens when you are talking to your crush and you are left speechless, embarrassed and buttonless.