Stage 1 - Denial
This usually occurs the morning or afternoon of the day you have to do your homework. You could start your homework now, but you have plenty of time in the day to do it, right? You can totally continue to binge-watch The Office. That assignment shouldn’t take too long, anyway.
Stage 2 - Panic
This is the stage where you come to the realization that you’ve done nothing productive all day and you have to start this homework immediately if you want to get it done in time.
Stage 3 - Productivity
The adrenaline from stage 2 has given you enough energy to bang out the first page of the assignment in no time at all and you’re feeling pretty confident about yourself.
Stage 4 - Food Break
After being mildly productive, you suddenly and inexplicably become ravenously hungry. At this point, you convince yourself that you deserve a break and go on to eat nearly everything in your line of reach because why not?
Stage 5 - Lag
This is the stage that occurs after you’ve taken a food break and would rather gouge your eyes out than continue writing. But, you convince yourself to continue but at a much slower pace. Before you know it, it’s taking you 45 minutes to write two sentences.
Stage 6 - Social Media Break
This is the stage where you will be tempted to pick up your phone so your brain can focus on something else for a minute. You tell yourself you're just going to answer a few texts but then you find yourself scrolling through Twitter, watching snap stories, and before you know it, you're watching a 30-minute vine compilation on YouTube.
Stage 7 - Self Realization
After wasting about an hour scrolling through your phone, you realize that if you didn’t waste so much time, you could have gotten so much more done by this time. The reality of your procrastination problem hits you and you start asking yourself questions like, “What’s wrong with me?” and “Why am I like this?”
Stage 8 - Hard Work
Based on the feelings of self-hatred you feel from stage 7, you convince yourself that you are going to be super productive and get this homework done no matter what!
Stage 9 - Burnout
This usually occurs when you are at the tail end of your homework. Even though you are almost done, you are so exhausted that you literally can’t convince yourself to write those last pages or finish those last problems because you just want the torture to end already.
Stage 10 - Print/Submit
This is the end stage. You finished whatever assignment you’ve been working on and it’s time to print it out or submit it. Despite all odds, you’ve made it through this mild trauma. So, curl up in your bed and grab a snack because you deserve it.
