Pennsylvania is known for its people, wildlife and attractions. If you're from the keystone state, you're aware of the good and bad qualities which you encounter on a daily basis.
1. There are four types of people: You, Amish, Deer and Construction Cones.
I'm convinced that there are more deer in Northwestern Pennsylvania than there are people; the construction cones reproduce and the Amish secretly run everything. It's a daily struggle driving to work and keeping an eye out for bushy tails who think they're inferior to an object moving at 55 mph. Seriously, give me a break. I'm already late for work.
2. All the people that leave eventually come back.
We all know one person who tried to leave the nest and somehow fell right back into it. The little town you grew up in seems to have a gravitational pull on its citizens. No matter how badly we want to leave, we always find ourselves right back home.
3. You get heated over "pop" or "soda".
There is always that one person who gets a room full of people arguing why "soda" isn't acceptable to say and "pop" is superior to all beverages. Depending on your location, you're more likely to say one or the other. Which one do you say?
4. You have to describe the location of your town from the distance of Pittsburgh.
"I am the one that is 150 miles to the north of Pittsburgh, a little to the east, a couple dirt roads down from the highway and behind the huge land that's used for cattle." Spoiler alert, there are more cities in Pennsylvania than just Pittsburgh and Philadelphia. Nothing is worse than trying to explain where your town is to someone who has never been through PA.
5. "Remember, there's never a fee unless we get money for you!"
Do I even need to explain where this comes from? (Actually, I do or else it's plagiarism). If you don't, it's the line from Edgar Snyder and Associates that you hear 50 times on JET 24 during the Action News.
6. You get excited for a groundhog.
Every year the little rodent comes out of the ground just to lie to us about the weather. How dare you say spring is around the corner? We just had a snow storm. We actually got our hopes up and got them crushed by a groundhog.
7. "No officer, I'm not drunk. I'm just avoiding the potholes."
Pennsylvania is notorious for its horrible road conditions. You'd think that we would stop putting so many businesses on Peach Street and actually fix something. Cough cough... (Like our state budget). Anyways, you're actually more skilled in missing the two feet deep craters in the middle of the road than doing simple algebra.
8. You can tell who is from Ohio just by their driving.
Let's play a game. Who can spot an Ohio driver by the way they ignore every traffic law and act like they own the road? FYI, turn signals are not optional.
9. There are two seasons: Winter and Construction.
I blame the groundhog for that one. They're not even two definite seasons, either. One day it is sweater weather and the next you're digging through your closet trying to find something to wear so you don't die of a heat stroke.
10. You own more guns than shoes.
We love our guns. We also like taking revenge on the deer that totaled our car last summer. God forbid congress passes a law restricting them. We all know who will be up for another civil war.
