As we approach the second half of recruitment this weekend, the overall vibe changes from more fast-paced and upbeat to more serious. Beginning with 9 Party, the rounds are longer, the dress is more formal and the conversations start to go below the basic "Where are you from?"/"What's your major?"/"So this weather sucks, doesn't it?" Many of the people you'll talk to in these later rounds are people you talked to in earlier rounds. This is the time when you really have to start thinking about if these PNMs would truly fit into your chapter, so it's important to have conversations with greater meaning that allow you to connect with the other person on a deeper level. Here are some conversation topics that can help you achieve that. I'd like to thank my recruitment chair, Ali Harris, for some of these wonderful suggestions!
1. How she spends her free time.Â
You can learn a lot about someone based on how she spends her free time — her hobbies, her interests, etc. Chances are, she'll say something really interesting that'll prompt a follow-up question or a "Me too!" response. To really make her think, ask her how she'd spend her free time if she only had 30 minutes to do so.
2. Where she would go if she could travel anywhere in the world right now.Â
This will probably lead into a conversation about  studying abroad and the places you or your friends have already been. Plus, it's always fun to talk about those places on your bucket list you've been dying to visit!Â
3. Three adjectives friends would use to describe her or she would use to describe herself to someone new.Â
This one always makes someone think; then you can follow up with questions like "What's an example of a time when you were _______?"
4. Her greatest accomplishment/achievement in life so far.Â
This is good for learning about her interests, work ethic and some of her background. If applicable, ask her how she got to achieving what she did.
5. Short-term and long-term goals in life.Â
What is one thing she wants to accomplish most this semester? This year? Before she graduates college? In 10 years?
6. Favorite time of day.Â
This might seem a little odd for a conversation topic, but you can actually learn a lot about someone this way. Is she a morning person or a night person? When is she most productive and energetic? If you prefer the same time of day, you'll certainly bond.Â
7. What she liked most and least about high school.Â
You might learn about the kind of school she went to, what she was involved in and the kinds of friends she has at home. You might share a good laugh (the thought of high school might be enough to make you shudder) or you might get into a great, deep conversation about your high school experiences.
8. What makes her laugh.Â
You'll probably learn something quirky about her. Then cue the laughing. But that's OK, because we want to be as relaxed as possible during recruitment conversations.
9. Someone she looks up to.Â
Whether it's a family member, friend, professor, etc., this will help you to better understand who some of the important people in her life are.Â
10. The things she values most.Â
Sororities were built on values and during recruitment, we're looking for women who exemplify those values and will continue living them as members. What better way to learn if she shares values with the chapter than by asking her what she values most!
And now, some general recruitment conversation tips, regardless of the topic:
- Ask open-ended questions, meaning questions that won't give you a "yes"Â or "no" or one-word answer.
- Balance questions and comments. Don't fire questions at the PNMs; that will only intimidate them. Make sure you're doing an equal amount of asking questions and responding to her answers.
- Pay attention to what the PNM is saying and try to keep the talk about yourself to a minimum. You want to show her that you're interested in getting to know her, and you also want her to feel comfortable around you.
- Ask follow-up questions. Don't just automatically go to the questions you have stored in the back of your mind. Engage her in the topic and only switch topics if it seems like you're going nowhere with it. The best way to keep the conversation focused on the PNM is to go off of her answers.Â
- Don't talk too loud. If one person talks loudly, everyone else will have to raise their voices to be able to hear and be heard. Then you won't be able to hear anything because the room is too noisy.
- Relax and be yourself! You've probably heard this time and time again, but it is truly important to having the best recruitment experience.Â
Best of luck to all this weekend. Bid Day will be here before you know it!