Just last week, I had received a book in the mail that I have been waiting to read for a very long time. The book was Eighteen Years by Madisen Kuhn, a writer who had become famous for her work through Tumblr. She has now branched out to Instagram and YouTube and she even has a blog (https://madisen.co). You probably have seen her work on Pinterest or Tumblr, maybe even Instagram; but you may not have known her name because it is always initialed m.k.

As I have been reading the book, I have come across many different writings of hers that have just struck something inside and made me feel something that is indescribable. Whether it relates to me personally or what I think about life, these poems and writings have found meaning in my heart and mind. So this week, i will be sharing 10 m.k. writings that made me feel some type of way.

1) Truth

i think the world

would be a nicer place

if we stopped pretending

we knew everything

about everyone

2) Why pt. i

there's something

entrancing about you,

i hear melodies like honey

when you enter my mind

you make me smile

even when

the rain is falling

and i think i could

make you happy, too

the two of us together

could be as beautiful as

the setting sun

but of course

the wicked reality is

we'll never get

the chance

3) Awakening

i long for a life i have control of

i want a space of my own, decorated

with photos that hold nice memories,

soft pillows, and scented candles

i want shelves filled with books of

adventure and poetry

i want to wake up every morning

excited for what is to come

i want to look up at the sky

and feel the sun warm my face

i want to go on long walks and hikes

and feel healthy and strong

i want to feel productive and satisfied

i want to take more photographs

and take up new hobbies

i want to become friends with

more interesting people

who will tell me stories about

places i've never been

i want to feel alive

4) Masks

please remember,

no one is as

strong

as they seem

no one is as

carless

as they pretend

to be

5) I Thought

what do you do

when you love someone

and you're bursting

literally bursting

to let them know

but you can't

because it's destructive

it's no good for you

and it's no good for me

i can't let go of it

i love you today

and tomorrow and i love

you past any thought

i could think up

it's wrong though

because you aren't right

you blemish my heart

and leave me with bruises

that will never fade

so what do i do?

because i can't stop

loving you

6) Writing Advice

write from your heart: scribble down words

when you're crying at 2am, or right after

you've gotten home from spending time with

someone you love, whenever your emotions

are at their peak. writing is best when it's

pure and raw and genuine. don't filter when you

write, just let your soul flow out onto the page

7) I'd rather have a lovely heart than a lovely face

I'd rather have scars on my cheeks

And a crooked nose and

Bad skin and honey hips

Or boring eyes and boring hair and a boring mouth

And someone tell me

"You're beautiful,"

Because I'd know they meant

I am beautiful in the way I talk,

In the way that I listen, in the way that I love,

In the way that I am

Then have

Pretty lips and pretty teeth and

Pretty hair and a pretty nose

And ignorantly believe

That being beautiful in the way that I look

Is enough

8) Finally

i spent a lot of time

searching for affection

in shallow spaces

i gave people bits of me

they didn't deserve

and i let myself be hurt,

because i thought

that's what i deserved

but once i let go

of trying to shove puzzle pieces

in places they did not fit,

once i let go of all the hate

i secretly had stored in the

gashes that decorate my heart

i met you

9) Black and White

if you're laying in bed

wrapped up in sheets

of miserable thought

go to sleep

if thumbing through old messages

only causes your heart to ache

and long for something unattainable

erase them

if it hurts to keep

everything you're feeling

bottled up inside

let it out

if you're clinging onto someone

that doesn't treat you like

you're worth the world

let them go

because sometimes

we choose to believe

that things are only

indistinguishable shades of grey

when in reality,

life is more black and white

than it seems

if you're unhappy

with the way

you are living your life

change it

10) Summer

you told me

you were going to change

to be a better you for me

and you said you wanted

so badly to make this work

i gave you every bit of me

and you tried to give me

every but of you, but

it was too difficult

for you to try to love yourself

when you were giving

so much of yourself to me

before i didn't want to let go,

i wanted to keep believing that

maybe

you'd be able to love me

as much as i loved you

and now that i've let go,

it doesn't feel like you're gone

more so, it feels like i'm the one

who has left you standing

with your face in your hands,

wishing you'd been able to be

a better you for me

i don't doubt one day

you'll be an amazing you

for someone else

and that one day

it'll all make sense to both of us

and i don't doubt

that one day

i will find someone

who will love me

as much as you wanted to