I’ve embarrassed my parent's hundreds of times as a little girl. The sweet, old ladies would always reach out to touch my hair and I would hit the fragile hand away and say, “Don’t touch my hair!” To my parents, I am so sorry. Having curly hair is as unique as it can possibly get. What people say about curly hair is not unique. I think those of us who were blessed/cursed with the curls will know exactly what I mean. So for those who ask, state or mention, let me go ahead and respond for you now.
1. Do you ever straighten it?
Oh, my. No, I don’t straighten it. Whenever I straighten my hair, it almost seems like the curl has nowhere to go. Before you know it, I walk out of the house looking like a poodle. It’s not usually the best look for me.
2. Can I straighten your hair?
Considering I just told you I do not ever straighten my hair, chances are I am not going to let you. You’d be asking me to sit still for about an hour or more, depending on what my hair wants to do that day. I’d rather not. Bring a hot hair straightener around me, the curls will look like this.
3. Can I touch your hair?
Oops. Did you see a sign somewhere that said “petting zoo”? If you did, I highly doubt it was pointed at me. However, if you are going to offer me food like you do the goats, then we will talk.
4. It’s so frizzy!
I’m sorry. Do you actually know what frizz is? Because it is not this luscious hair. Frizzy hair is what you find on Disney’s "Princess Diaries". Now, that’s some crazy frizzy hair.
5. Is that all natural?
Why on Earth would I ever make myself have this hair if I had the option? Yes, it is. The Bible says that God gives the hardest battles to His toughest warriors. Well, here I am.
6. I’m jealous. You never have to do anything to it.
*Insert drink being spit out here*. You're right. Taming the beast is not a full-time job. That is sarcasm by the way.
7. I wish I had curly hair.
Some people hate hearing nails on a chalkboard. Guess what we hate to hear! You know what, go ahead and get that perm. Then you can refer back to this list of what we go through daily. By the way, don’t ever wish something terrible on yourself.
8. Wow. How much money do you pay for hair products?
Let me put it this way for you. If I could just take your advice on number six and never do anything to it, I would have my college tuition paid off, own a beach house in every exotic island and I would give the rest to ASPCA to save all animals.
9. You should add some color to it.
Thanks for the advice but no thanks. Remember Justin Timberlake in 2000? Yeah, like the poodle look, that look doesn’t work for me either. I’d rather not look like I have Ramen-Noodles on my head.
10. Your hair is beautiful.
I hope you realize that we will never ever get tired of hearing this. Thank you so much for being a kind person and just complimenting us in the nicest way possible. Regardless of the way our curls are acting, we always have the best of luck with them looking good.
Dealing with curly hair for 21 years, I noticed that I will always stand out in a crowd. For someone who loves the spotlight, I can't say that I mind it. I used to stand in the mirror and cry for hours just looking at the mess. Now, I stand in the mirror and smile at the beautiful mess. Except for yesterday, I cried at it.
To my curly headed friends out there, you rock that look! Of course, to those asking or commenting, we really do love your attention. Keep it coming.