In my life, I have learned a lesson from each situation I have experienced as well as from each person I have encountered. I use these lessons every day and they have shaped who I am to this day. Some lessons were hard to learn while some came easily; but all in all, without these journeys, I do not know where I would be or how I would have turned out. Here are the 10 lessons I've learned in my 20 years:
1. "Nice or Nothing"
This is one lesson I have always remembered. My dad would always remind me while I was growing up to be nice or do not say anything at all. This has made me the better person in a lot of situations and has taught me to really think before I speak. You do not know how much what you say could affect someone.
2. Everyone has something
I used to have the “why me” mentality and think that I was the only one that was receiving the bad end of the stick. I was always reminded by my mom that everyone has something in their life that is troubling and it comes at a different time for each of us. I may have gone through hell at times, but I am not the only one. You are not alone when you are struggling, there is always chance someone else is struggling along with you.
3. Persistence and Discipline are important
I used to watch my dad work out every single day before he would go to the horses in the morning and then go to work. No matter how hard a job was or how tired he was, he would work out. In the realm of work, he had the same persistence and if he wanted it, he would work for it. He would not give up. I use this lesson now more than ever, when it comes to eating healthy, staying fit and working hard in school.
4. Do NOT take s*** from anyone
I was bullied in middle school and I just took it. I didn’t stand up for myself. I didn’t like confrontation and I still do not, but no one has to accept being bullied. If someone says something you do not like, say why. If someone is being rude, you can retaliate. It is your life and you do not need to accept blatant disrespect. I am still learning how to stand up for myself, but that middle school bullying taught me that I need to do something.
5. Be resilient
Let your worries be like water on a rain jacket -- just let them slide right off of you. I lost movement in half of my face and went back to school two weeks later. I lost my father before I hit the age of 18 yet never missed a day of school. Losing my father was the most horrific thing that has ever happened to me, but it has made me a stronger person and made me appreciate life more. I grieved and cried but I got up the next day to face the world head-on.
6. Always be cautious
Taking risk is all well and good until you get in trouble or get hurt. Be careful with what you do. You can still have fun and go out. You can still be crazy -- but always think about how your actions will affect your life or reputation. I have done things I am proud of and I have done things I am not proud of. I have lived with the consequences of both. It is important to see the effects of consequences. Life is so short, so adventure. Just make sure you think, too.
7. Ditch the people who are not there for you
Only keep loyal friends around you, and ditch the ones who are not. The better the people are around you, the better you are. You do not have to be around those who put you down or intentionally avoid you. You will not be missing out by getting rid of the negativity in your life.
8. Its OK to make fun of yourself and your mistakes
I have done many things that I look back on now and say “wow, what was I thinking." I look back at dumb decisions and I laugh. That is how you deal with mistakes instead of crying or feeling like you just embarrassed yourself so bad. We have all done stupid and embarrassing things, so why hide and be shy about it. Laugh and move on, and others will too.
9. Do not be afraid to put yourself out there
I was always told I was good at making friends and that’s because I was not afraid to put myself out there and just be me. Do not think you have to change to make friends or find your place. There will always be someone who does not like you or who thinks you're weird. Ultimately, it is their loss. You will find friends, but finding good friends just takes time. It took me a semester or two to make decent friends at school, and I am still making friends along the way.
10. It’s OK to be independent
I have always been an independent person but it took me a while to learn that doing things alone is OK. I used to hate being alone but, after a while, I realized that being independent is actually really good. I feel like an adult and the alone time lets me get everything I need to do done. It gives me time to think. I don’t love being alone, but I have reached a point where I am OK with it and I embrace it.