The holidays are a wonderful time of year, filled with chaos, the sound of savings accounts emptying, and the occasional sobbing session. These things simply skip hand in hand with the literal joys of the season. However, the most stressful part of this time of year is without a doubt the infamous gift exchange.
We all experience the panic-stricken thought process of: "What does Brian want his year? What should I give to Aunt Susie? Grandpa Max will smother me in my sleep with a dirty pillow case if I give him another pair of Rudolph underwear". You want every gift to be perfect BUT original (and maybe slightly weird), because who wants to be boring, right? Where's the fun in that?
Here are some gift ideas that will be sure to make quite the impact this holiday season:
1. Vladamir Putin Scratching Post
Yes. It is exactly what it looks like. A scratching post made to look like a Russian dictator.
2. Potty Putter
We all know that one person who is ALWAYS in the bathroom. Give them a game to play while sitting on their porcelain throne. How incredibly thoughtful of you.
3. Portable Breathalyzer
Nothing says "I saw this and thought of you" quite like a portable breathalyzer. Holiday day drinking now made easy! Prepare the Mad Elf Ale, Grandma!
4. Personalized Face Lollipop
Now your favorite person can suck on a life-size lollipop of their own face! What a genius idea! Nothing like sucking on my own forehead to get me into the holiday festivities!
5. Six-Pack Beer Belt
It's a college kid's dream in fashionable camouflage colors, a beer fanny pack! A great way to pick up the ladies, or gents.
6. Chainmail Shoes
Who needs Jordans when you could get these bad boys fresh from the local blacksmith?
7. Face Candles
A gift of a melting human face without the legal complications!
8. Doll Head Plant Markers
Nothing like baby doll heads to make them say "Awe, I love it! This is just what I asked for!"
9. Rhino/Zebra Hoof Boots
For a small investment of $625.70, you could make someones whole year with this staple wardrobe piece.
10. Condom Corsage
Great for any formal event! Be the life of a party AND a lifesaver if someone forgets protection!
Pick and choose your favorite, you can't possibly go wrong.
Energetic dance performance under the spotlight.
Taylor Swift in a purple coat, captivating the crowd on stage.
Taylor Swift shines on stage in a sparkling outfit and boots.
Taylor Swift and Phoebe Bridgers sharing a joyful duet on stage.
