I've been told that I'm the queen of getting out of going to events, parties or social gatherings. This, my friends, is entirely true. Some of us are just home bodies. After a long day, I much rather relax and watch a movie than wear nice clothes and pretend to laugh at jokes that aren't funny from people I don't like. How do I do it? I hold a repertoire of valid excuses, personalized to different occasions. Choose the right one, and you too can be happily at home in your pajamas instead of going out.
1. I'm not feeling well.
Use this excuse sparingly or you will never be able to get out of anything ever again. If you overuse this excuse, your friends simply won't believe you and will show up at your house forcing you to start getting ready to go wherever you were trying to avoid going. When used sparingly and for the right occasion, this excuse can be your friend.
2. I just got my period.
Sorry guys, this one only works for girls and on girls. If you attempt to use this excuse on a boy, he simply won't understand and it will fail. If you use this on a girl friend, it can be very successful. She knows how it feels to be stuck in bed with never ending cramps- she will no longer force you to go out. Mission accomplished.
3. I have a huge paper due tomorrow that I haven't even started.
You must say that it's a paper. If you say exam, your friends will tell you to cram all day tomorrow. If it's a paper, they know that an assignment like that takes time, effort and endless research. They will surely let you pass on the outing if you use this excuse.
4. My friend needs me tonight.
Blame it on others. I, myself, tell my friends to blame things on me all the time when they want out of something. Need fake texts from me, begging you to stay the night because I need a friend? I'm on it. Find a friend that will do the same for you, and you're set. Friends that help one another get out of things are the best kind of friends you can have.
5. My mom needs me to come home.
Your friends can't fight the mom excuse, especially if it means you going home. Be mysterious, they don't need a reason as to why you suddenly need to go home. Moms are always the best for fake text messages, she will for sure help you out of this one.
6. I haven't slept in over 24 hours.
Your friends know you won't be any fun if you're tired, grouchy and just in a bad mood. They don't want you ruining their vibe, so they will let you pass on the outing. Say you crammed for an exam the night before and still haven't slept- they'll leave you alone instantly.
7. I think I have the flu- I haven't stopped puking today.
Everyone hates puke, they just do. Saying you're sick isn't enough. They'll tell you to take two Advil and meet them at the party. Puke on the other hand grosses people out, plus they don't want to get sick themselves. Faking the flu or food poisoning is always successful in moderation.
8. I already promised to go to another party tonight.
We all have more than one friend group. Claim you already committed to something else, but you will try your best to stop by. You will never stop by, but your friends think you tried, right?
9. I have an assignment due by midnight.
Midnight is the key here. Giving a deadline, especially so close, is something that your friends can't tell you to push off until later. Apologize for waiting until last minute, but you just have to keep hard at work since it's due so soon, oops.
10. I can't because I don't want to.
If you're friends are incessant and just won't let you not go, be blunt. If you truly don't want to go anywhere and want to be left alone, nobody can truly force you to go. When all else fails, use the blunt escape plan.
Do you have a go-to excuse to get out of things? Let us know in the comments!
