Living life with an anxiety disorder is not easy. Being friends with a person with anxiety disorder is even harder. I myself know that I am a burden to my friends, mainly because what I am going through is completely new for them. Most of them have never dealt with someone who overthinks roughly about everything that crosses her path. Luckily for me, I have some great friends who are open to learning more about what it is I am going through.
1. You ask to hang out, but they already have plans.
Now you are sitting around staring at your phone thinking that they hate you. Why? Because they can't hang out. After a quick second you realize that they are your friends, and what they do is not done to physically or mentally attack you.
2. You keep track of how many hours it takes for a person to respond back to you.
Though you love that you can see when a person has read your texts, it makes your anxiety run extremely high, because now you are calculating the minutes and seconds between each text message sent.
3. You can NEVER make up your mind.
Hmm, do I want Cheetos... Yeah, I want Cheetos. *opens bag of Cheetos* I don't really want Cheetos anymore *walks away only to return* on second thought I think I want to eat these Cheetos...
4. You feel like people hang out with you because they have to, not because they want to.
Because sometimes even you yourself wonder why people would want to be friends with you.
5. You are always saying to yourself that people can like you.
Having anxiety is not easy. Most of the time you feel like it is you against the world, and there is no way that people could actually like you. But trust me, that's not true. People do like you because you are great. Anxiety is just some crap that you can't get rid of.
6. You don't text that person you like because you are afraid that you're annoying them.
It's okay to text hey to that boy/girl you're interested in. Make conversation. It's okay, they won't bite... at least not through text.
7. You have your first ever anxiety attack in front your friends/significant other.
You have tried so very hard to avoid this moment. Focusing on your breathing and constantly telling yourself everything is going to be okay, but even then you can't avoid the inevitable attack. You are afraid to be in such a vulnerable position in front of your friends/significant other, but you also in a sense are relieved because you want to see if they will be able to handle what is happening.
8. You are constantly telling yourself to breathe.
Inhale and exhale, my friend. In through your nose and out through your mouth. It's going to be okay.
9. You don't tell people you have anxiety out of fear of judgement.
If a person judges you for something you have no control over, they should not be in your life. Simple as that.
10. You double... triple... quadruple text.
So you sent one text, and they haven't responded. So you send another 12. Why? Because you're not only worried they didn't get your message, but also because you are experiencing a multitude of emotions. Sorry for bombarding you, but I'm worried that you might hate me.
11. You Feel Tired ALL THE TIME
Because you are so stressed all the time from your anxiety, the stress causes a damage in your life, and you find that sleep is your only time that your mind is at peace