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10 Bad Habits You Picked Up From Charlie Kelly

Because suddenly you're craving a milk steak boiled over hard, with a side of jelly beans ... served raw.

Addie Rose Armstrong

Aug 22, 2016

West Virginia University

10 Bad Habits You Picked Up From Charlie Kelly

CloudPix

Ah, Charlie Kelly. The keeper of our hearts and reason behind our laughter... and Paddy's Pub's passing health inspection. If "Good Will Hunting" taught us anything, it's that janitors have far more to them than meets the eye. He may be illiterate, a glue enthusiast and a stalker, but he's a genius.

Here are 10 habits Charlie Kelly has whiddled your life in some way... even if its just by picturing denim chicken every time you eat KFC.

1. You're a horrible listener.

Friends gossiping? Mom yelling? Grandma calling? You just can't do it anymore.

2. You pay more attention to how your butt looks in those pants.

Butt, butt, butt pants!

3. And you don't pay attention to what you put into your body... like, at all.

4. And you don't care one bit.

5. You become more aware of the rat problem in your area.

And you're willing to go above and beyond to end it.

6. You can't take a good picture to save your life.

Even if you spend hours getting ready (LOL).

7. You start to dream in cartoons.

8. You start to acquire more and more pairs of long johns.

And you spend a disturbingly large amount of time in them.

9. You try your hand at internet dating.

Unsuccessfully, may I add?

10. You become completely out of touch with reality.

Like, astronomically out of touch.

Disclaimer: these 10 things are just the beginning. You may feel the sudden urge to clean a toilet, develop an obsession with Sears, or eat some cat food. Completely normal. ~* Embrace it *~ and don't forget to ask yourself... WWCKD?

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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10 Bad Habits You Picked Up From Charlie Kelly

Because suddenly you're craving a milk steak boiled over hard, with a side of jelly beans ... served raw.

1. You're a horrible listener.

2. You pay more attention to how your butt looks in those pants.

3. And you don't pay attention to what you put into your body... like, at all.

4. And you don't care one bit.

5. You become more aware of the rat problem in your area.

6. You can't take a good picture to save your life.

7. You start to dream in cartoons.

9. You try your hand at internet dating.

10. You become completely out of touch with reality.

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1. Taking care of yourself when you're sick

2. Making a to-do list

3. Planning your activities around the weather

4. Scheduling your own doctor’s appointments

5. Getting your own toilet paper

6. Making food without needing to ask your mom questions

7. Holding your tongue

8. Saving your paycheck (or your tax refund) to pay your bills

9. Balancing your checkbook

10. Going places alone

11. Packing your own lunches

12. Actually eating your vegetables...on purpose

13. Taking a multivitamin

14. Planning a life after graduation

Sometimes bigger isn't always better.

1. If something happens, everyone knows about it

2. Never getting to be invisible

3. Knowing every single thing about every single person in the town

4. New kids are a big deal

5. It’s hard to make new friends

6. On that note ... the dating pool is even smaller!

7. Teachers are weirdly close to their students

8. It forced you to make friends out of school

No, I can't help you.

1. When a customer wants to return a product, hands you the receipt, where is printed "ALL SALES ARE FINAL" in all caps.

2. Just because you might be having a bad day, and you're in a crappy mood, doesn't make it okay for you to yell at me or be rude to me. I'm a person with feelings, just like you.

3. People refusing to be put on hold when a customer is standing right in front of you. Oh, how I wish I could just hang up on you!

4. Having the same conversations over and over again! To be honest I really don't even want to talk to you right now, or have this fake ass smile on my face!

5. Always having to have a smile on your face. I promise I'm not as happy as I may look!

6. Customers not understanding that sometimes, mistakes happen. I am a human being, we all mess up sometimes!

7. Having the boss from hell, it's their way or the highway! Even though I did my job correctly and efficiently, if I don't do it the exact way you do, I'm a piece of shit.

8. Having coworker who don't help out, who bend the rules just enough to screw you over.

9. Having to be at work after closing because a customer is taking forever and half! Not like I'd like to go home or anything!

10. Having shitty hours and more shifts than you asked for. Just because we don't have enough workers, doesn't mean I want to pick up every shift that you cant cover, oh great boss of mine!

11. Not having time for a social life. It gets old saying, "I can't I have work..." Every day of the week!

12. Having that lazy costumer who can't do anything for themselves... no please I'll get that, it's no problem at all!

It's just my face, I swear.

1. When you meet new people, they automatically assume you hate them or are rude.

2. People are constantly asking you if you're OK.

3. After being friends with someone for a while, they confess to you, "I thought you were so mean when I first met you," or, "I thought you hated me."

4. You get told to smile more, but they don't understand how scary that would be.

5. You're always labeled as seeming "judgy."

6. Passing a friend with your RBF in full force and not realizing you just shot them a death glare.

7. Being sarcastic, but everyone thinks you're outright rude.

8. Not knowing how mean you really look until you see a picture of yourself in resting face.

9. Your apologies never sound sincere because of your emotionless face.

10. Your "mad face" scares you.

11. And, lastly, people are constantly asking you if you are happy or having a good time because you look bored to death.

Please hold your blonde joke.

1. "Is Elle Woods your spirit animal?"

2. "Is that your natural hair color?"

3. "Oh wow, you get good grades at school?"

4. "You must really like the color pink!"

5. "You’re probably not into sports, right?"

6. "You must have such a bubbly personality."

7. "Your wardrobe must consist of all things preppy."

8. "What sorority are you in?"

9. "You were probably a cheerleader in high school."

10. "You look like you’re from L.A. because your hair is so light."

11. "You definitely like Pumpkin Spiced Lattes from Starbucks!"

12. "Do you actually think blondes have more fun?"

13. "You must encompass the typical “white girl” stereotype."

14. "Is that daddy’s credit card you’re using?"

15. "So all of your friends are blonde too?"

16. "I’m surprised about you; I thought you would be a lot ditsier."

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