Do your homework! | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Arts Entertainment

Double, Bubble, Toil And... WE ARE IN TROUBLE! Witches Are Brewing!!!

An all-purpose guide to hunting witches.

44
Double, Bubble, Toil And... WE ARE IN TROUBLE! Witches Are Brewing!!!
https://www.pexels.com/search/Evil%20Witches/

In This Article:

A full moon is upon us… the perfect kind of night for conjuring. The covens are uniting and the witches are brewing, so you know what that means: TIME TO GEAR UP! The Maidens of Fright (witches) are no doubt plotting yet another day of destruction, beckoning Sodom and Gomorrah as they do every October ("AHS" Style). So, before they are able to go cast their spells and go all Winnie Sanderson on our asses (Cult classics, anyone?), here is a comprehensive guide to hunt down the trepidation inducing broom-riders…

You know the deal… THE HEEDING, DO IT!!!

Do your homework!

Witches come with a slew of historical and cultural lore, and thusly, impact. From the roots of Wicca to the Salem Witch Trials, to the TV show, "Charmed." There is no doubting the influence of the witchy-ness of black cats and broomsticks. And we cannot forget… "Hocus Pocus"! Nuff said.

Knowing Which Witch is Which!

Discerning the suspected witch (female, male, or otherwise) from a normal human can indeed be a tricky task. But, there are some tell-tale signs. Keep a watchful eye for the presence of black cats, broom collections, affinities for crystals, oils and brews, fancy-decrepit homes and old candles… oh, and if they are green, you probably have them (make sure it is NOT makeup)!

Preparing yourself!

To battle a magical foe, one needs to be magical in their own right. To do so, finally give in to having an all-weekend Harry Potter/Lord of The Rings bash, and educate yourself! Throw in some "Charmed" and "Witches of East End" for good measure!

If you feel so inclined, go to a priest and have him give you a cross (crucifix), holy water, a holy worry stone, some graveyard dirt, and salt for protection circles. YOU NEED LOTS OF SALT (what you can find in the local market will work too)!

Facing your foe!

Facing a foe who can harness the dark arts will no doubt be a taxing and difficult, but I am here to tell you… eh, it'll be hard. But you might be alright. Just go for it, slugger! (But seriously... maybe you shouldn't).

The Aftermath!

Seriously, you shouldn't go! But of you do, let me know how it goes. Really. I want to make sure you are OK…

Be careful out there Y'all… they'll cast spells on you! One wrong move and you'll be licking yourself… cuz you will be turned into a cat.

Happy Hocusing and Pocusing!


Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Mays Island
Courtney Jones

Today I started my third week of college at Minnesota State Moorhead. I have survived welcome week, finding my classes on the first day, and being an awkward loner in the dining hall. Even though I have yet to be here for a month, I have already experienced many thoughts and problems that only a new college student can relate to.

Keep Reading...Show less
college

"Make sure to get involved when you're in college!"

We've all heard some variation of this phrase, whether it came from parents, other family members, friends, RAs, or college-related articles. And, like many clichés, it's true for the most part. Getting involved during your college years can help you make friends, build your resume, and feel connected to your campus. However, these commitments can get stressful if you're dealing with personal issues, need to work, or aren't sure how to balance classes and everything else going on during the semester.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

9 Reasons Why Friends Are Essential In College

College without friends is like peanut butter without jelly.

720
Bridgaline Liberati and friends
Bridgaline Liberati

In college, one of the essential things to have is friends. Yes, textbooks, a laptop, and other school supplies are important but friends are essential. Friends are that support system everybody needs. The more friends you have the better the support system you have. But you also have someone to share experiences with. And don’t settle for just one or two friends because 8 out of 10 times they are busy and you are studying all alone. Or they have other friend groups that do not include you. Don’t settle for just one or two friends; make as many friends as you can. After the first couple of weeks of college, most friend groups are set and you may be without friends.

Keep Reading...Show less
sneakers and heels
Sister | Brother Style - Word Press

For a moment your world is spinning. The phone alarm has just scared you awake and you’re flooded by daunting thoughts of the day ahead. You have three assignments due and little time to work on them because of your job. You’re running late because you’ve hit snooze one to many times after yesterday’s long hours. You dizzily reach for a hoodie, craving its comfort, and rush for a speedy exit, praying you will have time to pick up coffee. Does this sound familiar?

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

11 Signs You Live At The Library As Told by 'Parks And Recreation'

A few signs that you may live in the library whether you'd like to admit it or not.

504
brown wooden book shelves with books

Finals week is upon us. It is a magical time of year during which college students everywhere flock to the library in attempt to learn a semester's worth of knowledge in only a week. For some students, it's their first time in the library all semester, maybe ever. Others have slaved away many nights under the fluorescent lights, and are slightly annoyed to find their study space being invaded by amateurs. While these newbies wander aimlessly around the first floor, hopelessly trying to find a table, the OGs of the library are already on the third floor long tables deep into their studies. Here is a few signs that you may live in the library, whether you'd like to admit it or not.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments