Wow. It has been so long. I think if I saw you again, I wouldn’t really know where to start. We did not end on the best terms, and we were forced to find our own closure. I think about you from time to time, and it’s crazy to me how we used to talk every single day—how at one point in our lives we shared everything with each other, how we knew everything about each other, how you were the first person I would call when I got angry with my mom or was too stressed out, and how you were the only person that could calm me down. How I can go from talking to you on the phone every single night to forgetting what your voice sounds like.
If I saw you again, I would want you to know that it hurt to lose my best friend. That in the times that I needed to talk to you the most, you weren't there. I wish we could have talked it out better, and that it hadn't ended like it did—that we could have stayed friends like we always said we would. But eventually I came to terms with the way things ended, and I moved on. I ran into some of our high school friends the other day and they asked me about you and what happened between us. They always say the same thing, "I thought you two would stay together forever!" And now I can honestly tell them that I'm glad that we didn't. Because we both found people that better suited us, and I'm happy that you're happy again with someone else.
I would want you to know that I’m not bitter anymore. With time, came closure. Sometimes I think back on our relationship when we were both really happy, before we both knew what it felt like to fall out of love with someone, and I smile because I think we were really lucky to find what some people spend their lives searching for.
I'd want you to know that I teared up a little bit writing this, and I think that’s because you will always have a little piece of my heart. That even though we have both moved on, we will somehow always care about each other.
I would want you to know that I’m happy for you. I'm happy that you have found someone who will love you, and that you have found someone to love. I would want you to know that I wish you the best, and that I hope you have found someone to spend the rest of your life with.
I want you to know that you will always mean so much to me, and even though our relationship ended on a sour note, I choose to remember the good not the bad. You were my first date. My first boyfriend. The first guy I ever fell in love with. And you will continue to hold a special place in my heart, because for two and a half years you were not just my boyfriend, but my best friend.
I eventually realized that, when we broke up, you did not take a piece of me that I would never get back. Instead, you left of piece of yourself with me that I would never forget. And I thank you for that. Thank you for showing me that I was strong. Because if I could move on from our break up and seeing you with someone else so soon, I could do anything.Thank you for giving me a home away from my home for two and a half years. Thanks for helping me show everyone that long-distance wasn't that bad. Thank you for showing me that saying goodbye means only being closer to the next hello. Thank you for showing me what it was like to be appreciated and loved. Thank you for two and a half years of some of my favorite memories.
Sincerely,
The first girl you fell in love with