"If you want something to last forever, you treat it differently. You shield it differently. You shield it and protect it. You never abuse it. You don't expose it to the elements. You don't make it common or ordinary. If it ever becomes tarnished, you lovingly polish it until it gleams like new. It becomes special because you have made it so, and it grows more beautiful and precious as time goes by." Elder F. Burton Howard

Marriages and relationships don’t just fail overnight; it is a slow fade. It seems that in today’s society more and more marriages and relationships are failing. We see books, blogs, magazines, etc. about making relationships last or making them better, but you do not usually hear a lot about marriages and relationships failing because people do not like to talk about such a sad topic. I asked a few people to give me reasons that these relationships are failing. Below is a list of the responses.

1. Lack of commitment.

Not only is lack of commitment happening in relationships, but also occurring in marriages. Genesis 2:24: "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become ONE in flesh (hence one)."

The term “one flesh” means that just as our bodies are one whole entity and cannot be divided into pieces and still is a whole. Today people are so focused on themselves that forget about their spouse or loved one. The lack of commitment is usually what many people give as a reason for a failed relationship. People do not realize that you actually have to become one in flesh. You are no longer two individuals, but are one as a whole in everything that you do in your relationship.

2. Lack of respect for each other’s feelings and needs.

This goes back to being so focused on ourselves that we lose focus on our loved one. We should respect the relationship. The book "Live Original" states “They can be our biggest blessings or they can cause our biggest problems.”

3. Communication problems.

Women and girls, if you are like me you do not like to tell someone when something is bothering you. I am one of these people who tend to hold things in when something is bothering me so I do not get someone down, this does not work well. Communication is one of the key things to a healthy relationship. With lack of communication, many people just hold onto things until something blows up and then everything hits the fan all at once. This is when things begin to go downhill.

4. Premarital sex is too common.

Where do I even begin? In today’s time young people are becoming more in more okay with premarital sex. It seems that in today’s society it is being accepted more and more, this is just a big “no”. God reserved sex for marriage; this goes back to Ephesians 5:31 which is stated above how a man should depart from his father and mother and how they should become one with flesh.

"Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body." (1 Corinthians 6:18)

"But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints." (Ephesians 5:3)

"But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart." (Matthew 5:28)

5. Different points in life.

Many college kids and young kids tend to deal with this. Often, we realize that our relationship with others is beginning to fail due to being at different areas in life and going separate ways. If you see that this is happening and your relationship is doing more harm than good with you going separate ways, sometimes as hard as it may be, it may be best to let the other person go. Just because you are going in opposite directions right now, doesn’t mean you will always be going in separate ways. People always say, “What is meant to be will always find its way.” I am a firm believer in this. You do not want to be holding someone back. If you are in a serious relationship and you are planning on having a future with someone then pray about it and just let them know that you are there for them no matter what.

6. No Godly leadership.

A Godly husband is to lead his family. “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself as a Savior.” (Ephesians 5:23).

I read an article stating, “The husband is to be head of his wife in the same way that Christ is head of the church. And what kind of headship did Christ offer the church? Christ loved the church so much that he never did anything harsh to her, he never did anything unfitting, and He never did anything angry or unjust. He loved the church so much that he counted it more precious than his own life. He gave up his own life so that she might life. This Christ himself is the model for you as a godly husband.”

There are different areas to lead in a relationship. The wife leads in a different area than the husband leads. No matter what area you lead in, set a Godly example in these areas.

7. Not focusing on growing closer to God, as a couple.

This is a topic that I could go on and on about. Guys and girls, women and men, not only should you be growing closer to God as an individual, but you should be growing closer to God, together. At the beginning of many relationships, people have a strong grasp on this, but I think as we get more comfortable with the individual this can tend to fade. It is so important to grow closer and closer to Him as your relationship progresses. Christ should be the center of every relationship. I think as long as Christ is the center of every relationship that you have, it will not fail. Choose every day to serve the Lord. You can choose to serve yourself or choose to serve the Lord, but by serving the Lord daily He will guide your steps.

8. Giving up instead of trying to work things out.

I have always been raised to fight for what I believe in. Marriages and relationships are not always easy…at all. You will face trials together; you will face tribulations together, but believe in your marriage and in your relationship and fight for it. We often take the easy way out of things when we are facing difficult situations. One of my favorite quotes comes from the movie, "Fireproof." “Marriage isn't fireproof. Fireproof doesn't mean the fire will never come. It means when the fire comes that you will be able to withstand it.”

When you face a difficult time in your life, marriage, relationship-- do not give up; do not take the easy way out. You are strong, you can make it work. Trials and tribulations do not last forever. Many times I believe that this is a testing of your faith. Trust in God, seek Him, HE will not fail you, He will guide your steps.

9. Not being content.

It seems that in today’s time people always want more. They think that there is always something better to have. A person can’t be content in a relationship if they are not content with God when they aren’t in a relationship.

In a world where relationships and marriages are constantly failing, we need to remember we serve a God that never fails us.

“God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, or sun without rain, but He did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and light for the way. If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.”

In a relationship, whether that is in a marriage or with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you should love each other, forgive each other, laugh together, watch your words, pray, and most importantly seek God and trust Him. He will take care of you and show you the path that you should walk in daily.